Tag Archives: dogs

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MY PACK

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It’s back to school for the kids and they have been hunting for bagpacks and pencil boxes. As for me I have been busy shepherding my pack in the right direction. After all, the flock has to be safe in the pen, safe from the wolves that skulk in the shadows waiting to prey on unsuspecting teenagers and kids.

Now you will ask who are these wolves and what do I have against them ? After all I am from the wolf family too. Then why the animosity towards them .

You have got the wrong end of the stick if you think I am talking about wolves from the animal kingdom. No siree bob, there is a twist in this tail. The wolves in question are the human wolves, far far more dangerous than the animal ones. And ever ready to prey on unsuspecting, innocent and fragile young lambs.

So now the question is how do I keep the children in my pack safe ? The answer is just by being there, Yes siree bob again. Just by being in their lives is a huge safety net for the children . Children with dogs and dogs with children go together like macaroni and cheese. One dog will do things which the combined force of parents,police force and the education system cannot do.

Just our presence will keep the child grounded, busy, responsible . Our positive energy will beat back the negative energy of human wolves. At the cost of repeating myself for the zillionth time – DOG spelt backwards is , you got it ! And once you get a dog for your kids God will forever hold them in the palm of his hands.

The last phrase is from a famous Irish blessing which goes something like this

” May the road rise up to meet you,

May the wind be always at your back,

May the sun shine warm upon your face;

the rains fall soft upon your fields

and until we meet again

may God hold you in the palm of his hand.”

So until we meet again on this website BOW WOW ! ( in this case it’s your turn to BOW to the WOW in us dogs 🐕 🐶! )

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DOGA aka DOG YOGA

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IN DEEP CONTEMPLATION OF THE DIVINE !

In a previous post I think I had explained that I am not the sweating it out and the gym type ( see ‘ Running with the hounds ‘ ) In fact, it gets wearisome , this expectation from humans that we as dogs constantly jump through hoops , mindlessly chasing balls to entertain humans who coolly stand on the sidelines watching and encouraging us. That is why when someone throws a ball at me I always run away with it and then it’s your turn to “fetch” it if you want to continue this mindless game, Tee hee .

 

 

Anyway, since we are on the subject of exercise I have discovered a cool new way to stretch my limbs without the sweat, particularly suitable for those who are more mature or have health problems like blood pressure, heart problems etc.

DOGS DO DOGA . BELLA IN YET ANOTHER DOGIC POSITION

It’s called YOGA ( for humans ) and DOGA ( for dogs ) . I think you may be familiar with the ‘downward dog ‘ position. Yes, we have contributed to this great science of yoga too ( see pic. )

DOWNWARD DOG IN MY PUPPY DAYS

OUR CONTRIBUTION TO YOGA – THE DOWNWARD DOG !

YOGA DOG OR DOGA IN DEEP THOUGHT . I WONDER WHAT DEEP PHILOSOPHY IS GOING THROUGH HER MIND. THE NATURE OF THE UNIVERSE, THE PURPOSE OF OUR EXISTENCE OR IS IT JUST THE MOST BASIC QUESTION OF LIFE – IS THAT PERSON ON THE TABLE GOING TO SLIP ME THE SAUSAGE WHICH IS DANGLING OFF HER PLATE ?

Then , there is my favorite position, the lying supine one ; also called ‘playing dead ‘ in dog language. I am in this position for the better part of the day and it suits me fine. If you are in this position you are totally healthy, no stress at all. I love it.

Playing dead or ’shavasana’

 

Another ‘SHAVASANA’ or playing dead position . Sooo relaxing 😌

ANOTHER ‘SHAVASANA’ . I am not really dead, don’t worry 😉 

BELLA’S FAVORITE POSITION.

In fact, we dogs are very similar to the yogis ( or those who do yoga ) ; that’s why we are called doggys ( pronounced in a way to match ‘yogis’ ) You may well ask how ? Well, like yogis or ascetics we have no materialistic desires, we do not ask for a mansion, car, even a family. We live a simple life and even’beg’ for our food. Like yogis we wear no clothes ( at least they have a loin cloth ) and like yogis we will travel the world with not a care if you let us off the leash . Like yogis we love you for you are our God and we are loyal to you as one should be loyal to God. Maybe, that’s why, when language was first invented we were just GOD spelt backwards and we bow to the wow in you in a downward dog position !

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WHATEVER FLOATS YOUR BOAT BELLA !

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( This post has been written by “ Bella’s sister” – the budding writer – Ambika. Six years ago A was the first one who had written to Cuckoo and Banana – Drama ; I have reproduced the letters below . Now she brings forth her own take on Bella’s activities and they are as fresh as the first rain after a long dry spell  ! Children always have their unique view of the world . )

Bella writes ( through Ambika’s pen ) –

Since this new season has come around, my sister’s friends have been hanging around. Honestly, the first time all of them came was fun because they ( like everyone else ) loved me and gave me so much attention . But after the third time of so many people coming , I’m exhausted. If I’m just relaxing , almost every time I am disturbed . Why am I always the one who has to get up. I feel these people don’t apppreciate me enough. Like they act they are doing me a service.

Anyways , as I was saying . When her friends come they sometimes jump into this huge water bowl in my backyard/territory. But my assistants never let me go out with them, it’s ridiculous. I mean, when I’m let out by “accident “ I want to join the fun as well but I get in trouble for that. How fair is that ? They get to have fun and I don’t ? There was one time when I jumped in the water , then one week later the water bowl was emptied, it was just a bowl !

The last thing I am going to talk about are those darn squirrels that think it’s ok to come into my territory. When they come, my retriever side comes out. I start barking and banging outside the door until one of my assistants open it for me, then I bark my tail off. For some reason they always come back for more. Every time I protect my assistants from these vicious creatures.

Now I’m signing off !

XOXO

Bella 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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AMBIKA’S LETTERS TO BANANA DRAMA AND CUCKOO.

PROFESSOR OLLIE

( who translates the human language to ‘critter’ language and vice versa )

 

LETTER TO BANANA-DRAMA
Dear Banana drama,
Why are you so crazy? Why did you put skates on Mr. Tittle Turtle? You are very cute and one day, I hope you travel to the moon

Love,
A

Banana Drama

Banana Drama

BANANA – DRAMA’S REPLY

Yo, A

I am not only crazy but also cool, I am a crazy cool monkey.

I was just helping Mr. Tittle Turtle to walk faster, he is so slow that sometimes by the time he has reached his own birthday party and blown out the candles it is time for his next birthday party and we don’t have so much time like he has. Do you know a turtle can live up to 150 years so he can take things slow but not us monkeys.

I do want to travel to the moon one day but I would like to do it on a full moon night. What if there is half a moon and I land on the dark side, how will I see stuff. And on a night when there is no moon, what if I don’t find it? I think I better ask my science teacher about this, you do that too.

Love,

Banana Drama.
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LETTER TO CUCKOO ( MELODY’S MOM)

Dear Cuckoo,

You are very pretty. But it is not nice to give your baby to someone else.

Your funniest fan,

A

Cuckoo Cool

Cuckoo Cool

CUCKOO’S
REPLY

My dear A

Thank you! Lots of my fans have told me I am pretty, very pretty. I also have a beautiful voice. Now if you have some talent you have to let it shine. I had to go to King Tweety –Fruity’s kingdom to be a star and a baby would have been a bother. So, I did the best thing for Melody, I left her with Maggie Hatchery.

She is going to have four babies so she can look after one more. Maggie is a good mom so she is in good hands.

Love,

KuuKuuuu.
( this is my star name)

 

 

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BELLA PLANS TO GET RID OF TOBY FROM HER LIFE …..but GOD has other plans !

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One day Bella was snoozing in the corner which was her usual habit when she heard that familiar bark. “ Oh ! No ! Toby is visiting again ! He is so boisterous! It’s not his fault, he is only two which in human years is fourteen . A teenager ! Ye gods ! His over active hormones are making him run around and bark and jump and he can’t stop.”

Bella looked up and saw Toby scampering in and sliding to stop when he spotted a ball.

“There he goes. Obsessing about balls all the time. So that’s his weakness. ⚽ 🏈 🏀 BALLS !

Now Bella may be a laid back dog but she is also very intelligent.  She knows that your enemies weakness can be made into your strength. So what do you think she did to keep Toby away from her ?

She took each and every ball and hid them in the laundry room. Now the laundry room is very small and really there is no place to hide anything, especially not balls of every shape and size. So there they were filling up the laundry room with Toby snuffling at them and nosing them around.

The help who had loads of laundry to do was getting quite irritated 😠  😣  😤 . Every time she came in with a load to wash there was Toby who is rather big, big enough to fill up the laundry room, going at his balls. The help was muttering and kicked out Toby’s balls. But when she got busy in the kitchen Bella would nose it back into the room. Sometimes she nosed one of balls into the kitchen so that Toby would scamper there and get in her way.

Soon the  help was fed up and started to complain to Bella’s owner. “ Too much disturbance, too much trouble, this “perro” ( dog 🐕 in Spanish ) too big. He make too much trouble. Me no work with this dog !”

Poor Toby. Bella was happy. Now she would have the house all to herself.

But then the children ( A & A ) were distressed. If Toby was banned from the house then Toby’s owner ( yes, unlike Bella who has assistants some dogs have owners ) who was the children’s friend ( another A ) would not be able to come so often. They prayed to DOG spelt backwards to help them.

Now Bella being Bella was also a very kind hearted dog and she did not like her assistants to be unhappy 🙁. So guess what she did ? Come on, take a guess !

She took each and every ball and nosed them into the garage every time the door leading to the garage would open. She only left a small blue ball for Toby to play with. Now Toby no longer had any interest  in the laundry room or the kitchen. He flapped his ears , wagged his tail and pounced on his blue ball.

FLAP, WAG AND POUNCE

 

 

 

 

 

TOBY AND BELLA ARE FRIENDS

 

 

 

Toby was happy, the children ( A & A ) and their friend ( A ) were happy and most important Bella and Toby were no longer enemies.

DOG spelt backwards is in his heaven

And all’s well with the world !

( This last sentence is from a very famous poet , Robert Browning . It goes like this :

The year’s at the spring

And day’s at the morn;

Morning’s at seven;

The hill-side’s dew-pearled;

The lark’s on the wing;

The snail’s on the thorn;

God’s in HIS heaven —

All’s right with the world.

In those days , sometime in 1800’s or so , people were quite happy looking at birds in the sky and snails on the ground . They didn’t need phones and video games to be happy. You should try it sometime !!

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BELLA BRINGS IT ON

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Hello folks, I bet you are wondering where this dog diva has vanished. I have been away for a bit. No, not on a vacation unfortunately. I just had a massive writer’s block which just means I didn’t know what to write.

I kept wondering what brings on this situation which is particular to dogs and writers or dog writers. And then I realised it was brought on by disturbance and that caused me stress. I was going round and round chasing my own tail.

ROUND AND AROUND

 

 

 

 

Then I thought what was it that was causing this condition ? Could it be my diet ? I am eating dog food only and that is not a happy situation for a dog who has had a taste of human food once. They just can’t go back. But then, it’s not up to us , is it ?

Is it the environment ? I have been at the receiving end of a lot of unwanted attention recently. When it comes to company, I am very choosy. I like human company or dogs who are more human than dog which means they have to be civilized and well mannered and not boisterous.

 

Watch this and you don’t have to make any wild guesses as to the source of my angst ( angst means distressed 😩  in spirit – now you can use this word casually in a conversation and impress your mom and dad e.g . There is so much angst in me because  I can’t play video games for 14 hours ! Just kidding . Don’t play more than 13 hours ! Kidding again. Only what your parents  permit  you )

 

So that’s it. I have found the root of my disturbed state. It is Toby. He has become a frequent visitor and he is making me uncomfortable. He is just not my type. To add to my woes he has been slurping water from my bowl and crunching food from my plate without so much as by your leave.

TOBY TROUBLE

 

Okay, now that I have got to the root of my stress I am going to do something about it. Wait for my next post about ” Bella plans to get rid of Toby.” If you have read the story, “All about cats” where Bella was saved from the machinations of a wily cat by divine intervention then you know it’s not in a DOG’S hand/paw to save herself but in a DOG spelt backwards hand to help this dog !

( Of course, we all know that DOG spelt backwards helps those who help them selves. So let’s see if DOG spelt backwards will guide the intellect of this DOG with his shining knowledge ! )

LEAD KINDLY LIGHT …..

LEAD KINDLY LIGHT …

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Happy 😀 Independence 🇺🇸 Day ☀️! ( it will be happier if you could throw this dog diva a bone or better still , a sausage or two )

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BELLA’S ANGST RIDDEN TIRADE !

IS THIS RIGHT ? IS THIS FAIR ? WHY ARE WE NOT INDEPENDENT ENOUGH TO DECIDE WHAT IS GOOD FOOD FOR US ! HOW DOES THE SLAVE ( YOU )DECIDE WHAT IS GOOD FOR THE MASTER / MISTRESS ( MOI )

All right folks, here is Bella, the dog diva pontificating about , ‘cabbages and kings and whether pigs have wings !’ Lewis Carroll, the fellow who wrote this gibberish was quite a genius wasn’t he ? And talking of nonsensical verse there is the inimitable Robbie Yates, check him out ! https://wp.me/P9q2s6-2

Now coming back to the subject of ‘whether pigs have wings ‘ is the related one about sausages. It’s Fourth of July and Barbecue day where sausages are floating around right in front of my eyes. But the question is, are all those floating sausages held by various humans of all shapes and sizes going to find their way into my mouth ? I have noticed when it comes to food the human kind are not very kind . I see them chomping away on various delicacies with nary a thought of their lord ( in this case lady aka moi ) and master waiting in the wings for a tidbit. And, if we are denied this delicacy why do you even call it hot dog !

And what’s all this nonsense about dogs should only have dog food !! It makes my blood boil . Who made these rules ? And why ? And why give us a taste if you are going to abruptly deny these privileges with some cockamamie reason like , ‘no wheat for the dog ‘ and ‘sugar makes her hair fall ‘ and ‘ Bella is putting on weight ‘

If that is the case then please look at yourself , humans . Why are you eating all that red meat ! And slathering those buns with butter and chugging down huge amounts of soda and topping it off with that brown looking sweet thing with that cold even sweeter mess on top ? ( Bella’s talking about Brownies with vanilla bean ice cream ) . This is hypocrisy carried to the extreme. But, I am not going to make an issue about it. After all its Independence Day and you are free to do what you want, even stuff your faces till you are ready to burst. Just don’t forget the dog waiting in the wings for her share of goodies too .

Happy Independence Day !

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HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY !
Photo by AMBIKA , the assistant who is the best tummy rubber, ball thrower, AND now the best dog 🐶 photographer ! Kudos kid !

MORE PHOTOS COMING UP AS SOON AS MY ASSISTANTS ARE READY TO TAKE THEM ( WHEN THEY CAN TEAR THEMSELVES AWAY FROM THE FOOD )

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A HELPING HAND / PAW

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Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof …

I think by now you know the drill. Just keep woofing as you read the translation below , translated by the inimitable Dr. Ollie whose full name is written on the name plate on the tree. Why is the name plate on a tree, you may well ask. Well, it’s because he lives on a tree, and not in a house as we lucky denizens of the animal world do !

‘ PAWS ‘TO REFLECT …..

Though I am not sure who is the lucky one , us or the human whose home we get to live in. Because , all said and done for a meal a day , a few treats and a little bit of love we give back in spades .

Some of us are there to guard your home and hearth with our lives !

Taking us for a walk gives YOU exercise and keeps you fit.

Feeding and taking care of us gives YOU a routine and responsibilities ( especially important for children ! ) .

And, of course, with us around YOU can never get lonely. Your own flesh and bloood may desert you but not us . Humans can learn a thing or two about loyalty from us .

AWESOME ‘ PAW ‘ some !

We are there for the young and the fit and for the elderly, the sick, the disabled, ever ready to give a helping hand/paw .

See photo .

Bella, the dog diva , moi, is best for the helping hand / paw bit. If you have read my previous posts you probably realize that I am not the guard dog type ( too ‘’unfeminine’’ I say ) , exercise is also not my cup of tea except for an occasional run ( just for photo-ops ) but lounging , cuddling and holding hands , well, that’s right up my alley, actually, no, not alley , that’s for alley dogs , it’s right up my street , ummm not that too ; it’s my forte, my thing , my area of expertise.

‘ PAWS ‘ ABILITY

So if you are lonely or sick or tired of the worries and weight of the world come on over. I am there to hold your hand as best as I can . You know I have paws ! Not hands with opposable thumbs ! ( Read previous post ‘Why can’t monkeys write ?’ if you need full explanation )

All right then , here is Bella, the dog diva signing off .

P.S. Since life is a learning process why don’t you use your fingers and your opposable thumbs to hold a pencil and write down the actual word wherever I have written

in inverted commas .