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THE FINAL SOLUTION – THE PYTHON AND THE POMEGRANATE

The wily leopard and his three assistant hyenas try to cure the python and also try to use their talents to save their business. 

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Pomegranate fruits – Good for your health !

There was a python who just loved to eat and sleep. That is what he would do all day long. Eat and sleep. Eat and sleep. Eat and sleep. Now if you do this all day long and then day after day , then you are going to fall very, very sick. And that is what happened to the silly python . He became very, very sick. His tummy started hurting. Ow ! Ow ! Ow ! He howled. Now, if he had hands he would have clutched his stomach and howled just like you do. But pythons don’t have hands. Just a long body. So, he took his long body and stretched it and decided to crawl to the doctor. As the python was crawling to the doctors’ clinic he felt very hot and tired. So, he decided to rest under a tree. It was a tree with very red fruits hanging from it.

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The python was very sleepy. He opened his mouth to yawn. Just then, PLOP, one of the red fruits fell into his mouth. The python gulped down the fruit as was his habit and fell off to sleep. When the python got up he was feeling much better but then, he thought to himself that since I have come so far I might as well see the doctor and find out why my stomach aches all the time. So, he crawled to Dr. Leopards’ clinic and lay down in the waiting room along with the other animals who also had some problem or the other .

Dr. Leopard asked the python to come into his examination room and asked him to lie down. The python said, “I am already lying down since I cannot sit.” Dr. Leopard made a face as he did not like anyone to correct him and said , “Yes, yes, I meant , lie down on the couch so I can examine you . Tell me, what is your problem?”
The python said, “I had a stomach ache but now I am fine. The stomach ache is gone.”
Dr. Leopard was surprised to hear that the python was feeling better without taking any of his medicines which were quite expensive. So he asked the python, ” Tell me Mr. Python, what did you do after you had the stomach ache ?
The python said, “Don’t you want to know how and when I got the stomach ache so you can cure me ?”
The leopard looked very silly in front of his helpers so he he smiled with his very sharp teeth and said,” Yes, yes! Please tell me what you eat and what you did ?”
The python said, “Well, in the morning I swallowed my breakfast in one gulp and went to sleep. Then, at lunch, I swallowed my meal in one big gulp and went to sleep and then, at dinner …….”
The leopard said, “Wait, I am a doctor, I know what you did. You gulped down your dinner and went to sleep!”
All the doctors’ helpers clapped at the doctors intelligence.
The python said, “I have been doing this for many,many days ! But then, yesterday, I had a BIG stomach ache, not the usual small ones. Maybe, it was because I went to a party and gulped down everything .”
“Hmmmmmmmmmm” said Dr. Leopard,” I see the problem now. You don’t chew your food. You must chew your food before you eat it .”

The python was very surprised that the doctor did not know that pythons don’t have teeth. He thought to himself, ” I better get out of here and find some doctor who knows his job. This doctor has a fancy coat but he does not know what he is doing.”

The python said, ” Now, that I am much better, I think I will go home.” He tried to crawl out of the room but Dr.Leopard blocked his way and said, “Wait, wait. You didn’t tell me what happened after the stomach ache. How did you get well? ”

The python was trapped in the room with the doctor and his assistants so he decided to clear the mystery of his wellness. He said, “well, I crawled all the way to your clinic which is quite a distance away. On the way, I was feeling sleepy so I slept under a tree. It was a tree with red fruits. When I yawned one of the fruits fell in my mouth and I gulped it down and then fell asleep. When, I got up I was feeling much, much better.”

Dr. Leopard said, ” It seems to me you slept under an apple tree and that is why you are fine now!”

The python said, ” I am sure it was not an apple tree!”

Dr. Leopard said, ” How can you be so sure that it was not an apple tree. You did say the fruits were red !”

The python said , ” I know it was not an apple tree because we all know that an apple a day keeps the doctor away . But, as you can see, here I am with you and you are a doctor and you are not going away and you are not letting me go away too ! So, you see it was not an apple tree . ”

Dr. Leopard was stunned by this intelligent answer. He thought to himself, this python is very smart. Maybe, I can use him to get more patients.

TO BE CONTINUED ……….

ALL RIGHT, HERE’S THE NEXT PART OF THE STORY ….

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😮 OMG ! CAN I JUST GO HOME ?

The doctor looked at the python and bared his very sharp, pointy teeth and said, “Well, Mr. Python, you seem to be very smart. I see that you don’t have a job as you told me yourself. So, why don’t you come and work for me ? I will pay you very well. “

The python was very surprised that the leopard was offering a job to him because as far as he knew the animals were afraid of him especially when he was hungry.

He asked Dr. Leopard, “ How will you pay me ? And in return what do you want me to do ? “

Dr. Leopard knew that if he told the python that he was planning to use him to get rid of the animals who refused to get cured by swallowing them he may not agree to work for him. That was his plan to solve his own problem and that of the python.

So he told the python, “ Mr. Python, you don’t have to do much work. You have to be as you were before. Just eat and sleep . The only difference is that you will eat what or who I tell you to eat and you have to do this in my clinic.”

The python thought to himself, “ This leopard is very clever but also very wicked. It’s not good to be with wicked people. So let me try to find a way so that this leopard does not kill off his patients he cannot cure. And there are too many of them. Even I will not be able to swallow so many of them because I only swallow when I am hungry not just for fun ! “

The python looked at Dr. Leopard looking eagerly at him as a solution to his problem of not being able to cure his patients and said , “ Dr. Leopard, why don’t you try some other way to help your patients ?”

Dr. Leopard said, “ Mr. Python, I know there are many other ways but this one is quick and foolproof.”

Actually Dr. Leopard did not know of any other way but he did not want to admit this in front of his assistants who thought Dr. Leopard was the cat’s whiskers. Also his assistants were a couple of hyenas who lived off the leftovers which the doctor could not finish.

Mr. Python said, “ Maybe your way is the quickest and foolproof and with no danger of being sued because there is no one to sue you or no evidence but sooner or later the animals of the jungle will realize what is going on and will stop coming to you. Then what will happen to your practice ? “

The assistant hyenas gasped at this possibility because they lived on the slim pickings left by the leopard and they were already very thin. Dr. Leopard also did not want to lose his very lucrative business ( which means a kind of work in which you make a lot of money ) so he asked Mr. Python, “ All right, what is your idea so that I can cure the patients who come to me ? “

Mr. Python said, “ It’s very simple Mr. Leopard.”

ALL RIGHT , LET ME KNOW WHAT WAS MR. PYTHON’S SOLUTION TO THE PROBLEM AND THE BEST ONE WILL GET TO GO ON A TRIP TO HAWAII PAID FOR BY THEMSELF. IF I HAD THE MONEY I WOULD HAVE GONE MYSELF NOT SIT HERE WRITING THESE STORIES IN DULLSVILLE.” I WOULD WRITE THEM IN HAWAII .

THANK YOU FOR YOUR RESPONSE ; THEY WERE GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT, JUST LIKE THE POMEGRANATE ! THIS IS MY VERSION. 

AND THERE IS A BONUS STORY , LUCKY YOU ! THE STORY IS CALLED ‘THE PYTHON AND THE POMEGRANATE TREE’ and is somewhere on this website.  Oh wait, here is the link

https://wp.me/p4LwKY-p9

” The solution is that you and your assistants get together and buy a huge farm where you grow many healthy herbs and fruit trees like the pomegranate. You encourage your patients to eat the healthy foods and exercise so that they do not fall ill again. Pomegranate juice is especially good for health so grow a lot of pomegranate trees ”

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Pomegranate tree

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Dr. Leopard said, ” But that does not solve my problem. If people get well how will I run my practice. I need people to be cured but not completely cured so that they keep coming back to me .”

The python said, ” That’s not a very nice thing for a doctor to wish for but you are a leopard and I guess you won’t change your spots. So I think then there is only one final solution to this problem. The leopard moved forward to the python eagerly. And that’s when the python wrapped himself lovingly around the python and squeezed him. That was the Final Solution.

THE END

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THE PYTHON AND THE POMEGRANATE TREE – THE BONUS STORY I PROMISED .

SHORT STORY FOR CHILDREN 4 to 7 years

This is the story of a python . The python was a very strange looking fellow. He loved to do strange things too . Every day he would swallow an animal and go to sleep. Now if you only eat and sleep 😴 and eat and sleep 😴 💤 you are going to fall sick. And that is why the python got very very sick 🤒. And his tummy hurt.

So his wife, Mrs Python said, ” Why don’t you go to the doctor Mr. Python ?”

So Mr. Python set off to get himself treated by Doctor Cheetah.

Now we all know that pythons do not have feet so he started to crawl to Dr. Cheetah’s clinic. He crawled and he crawled. It was very hot so he got very tired and lay down under the shade of a tree which had many red fruits hanging on its branches . One of the fruits fell on the python’s head. The python, as was his habit, gulped down the fruit in a jiffy.

After some time Mr. Python felt that he was feeling well. He also had no stomach ache. But by now he had crawled to Dr. Cheetah’s clinic.

Dr. Cheetah, who was always very troubled about his work asked Mr. Python, “Mr. Python, what is your problem ? ”

The python said , “I had a stomach ache but now I am all right . I was feeling very sick but now I am fine.”

Dr. Cheetah said, ” How come you are feeling fine. I have not given you my medicine ? ”

Mr. Python said, “I don’t know. I crawled all the way here. On the way I slept under a tree and when a fruit from the tree fell on me I eat it up. ”

Dr. Cheetah said, “What did the fruit look like ? ”

The python said, ” It was round and red. Inside the fruit there were many tiny red seeds. It was very sweet but it’s skin was very thick .

Dr. Cheetah said, ” It seems to me you eat a pomegranate. The pomegranate fruit is very good for your health. Besides this you came crawling all the way here which is good exercise . Exercise is very good for health . Now bear in mind, eat some fruits and vegetables and also exercise. All right then, give me my fees now. ”

The python said, ” Fees ? Why should I give you fees. I got well on my own.”

Dr. Cheetah thought to himself that if the animals of the jungle start getting well on their own just like this python then what will happen to me, how will I put food on my table ? ”

Dr. Cheetah quickly opened Mr. Python’s mouth and popped in a burger. As soon as the burger went into the python’s stomach it started aching . He started crying loudly, ” Help me, save me ! It feels like a hundred rats are jumping inside and biting my stomach. He started to cry, “Ow !Ow !Ow !”

Then Dr. Cheetah said, “Should I give you some medicine ? ”

Mr. Python understood that Dr. Cheetah was being clever and only wanted to take his money.

Mr. Python said, ” No, I will crawl back home. On the way I will eat a pomegranate. I do not need your services. ”

The other animals who had come to get treated heard what Mr. Python said and were very happy. They thought to themselves , this is an excellent idea. If we can keep ourselves healthy then we don’t have to give Dr. Cheetah his very hefty fees. In a trice they got up and followed the python but kept their distance from him for they did not want to be swallowed by the python in case he got hungry.

When the animals reached the pomegranate tree they all started jumping up to pluck the pomegranate fruits and pop them in their mouths.

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Pomegranate fruits – Good for your health !

 

The pomegranate tree had no fruits left. He thought to himself , ” Goodness gracious , one fruit tree and a hundred impatients! Now what will happen to me if I fall ill ? Boo boo ! ”

A butterfly 🦋 who was flitting by saw the pomegranate tree crying and said, ” Brother Pomegranate tree, don’t worry. The few flowers which are left on you will soon become fruits. That is our job. We will fly from the flowers of one tree to the flowers of another one so that we can help them to become fruits. ”

The pomegranate tree was very happy. He thought to himself, ” It’s quite all right if the animals plucked all my fruits and eat them up. Now they will be cured soon. And, I, too will be well for the person who helps another person stays always well for God helps him. Yes, but God punishes those who rob from other people for no reason at all. Just like that cheetah who is called cheetah for a reason . Now he will always be worried that now that the animals have cured themselves who will come to me for treatment and how will I put food on my table ”

That is why it is said , ” ‘ Cheetahs’ never prosper . ”

THIS STORY IS INSPIRED BY MY FATHER, COL. B. C. SHUKLA WHO GAVE UP ALL HIS FRUITS TO HELP THE ANIMALS OF JUNGLE LAND .

Here is a poem written for him ( on the left and a poem by him , ‘MARTYRDOM’ ( on the right )

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WHATEVER FLOATS YOUR BOAT BELLA !

( This post has been written by “ Bella’s sister” – the budding writer – Ambika. Six years ago A was the first one who had written to Cuckoo and Banana – Drama ; I have reproduced the letters below . Now she brings forth her own take on Bella’s activities and they are as fresh as the first rain after a long dry spell  ! Children always have their unique view of the world . )

Bella writes ( through Ambika’s pen ) –

Since this new season has come around, my sister’s friends have been hanging around. Honestly, the first time all of them came was fun because they ( like everyone else ) loved me and gave me so much attention . But after the third time of so many people coming , I’m exhausted. If I’m just relaxing , almost every time I am disturbed . Why am I always the one who has to get up. I feel these people don’t apppreciate me enough. Like they act they are doing me a service.

Anyways , as I was saying . When her friends come they sometimes jump into this huge water bowl in my backyard/territory. But my assistants never let me go out with them, it’s ridiculous. I mean, when I’m let out by “accident “ I want to join the fun as well but I get in trouble for that. How fair is that ? They get to have fun and I don’t ? There was one time when I jumped in the water , then one week later the water bowl was emptied, it was just a bowl !

The last thing I am going to talk about are those darn squirrels that think it’s ok to come into my territory. When they come, my retriever side comes out. I start barking and banging outside the door until one of my assistants open it for me, then I bark my tail off. For some reason they always come back for more. Every time I protect my assistants from these vicious creatures.

Now I’m signing off !

XOXO

Bella 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

AMBIKA’S LETTERS TO BANANA DRAMA AND CUCKOO.

PROFESSOR OLLIE

( who translates the human language to ‘critter’ language and vice versa )

 

LETTER TO BANANA-DRAMA
Dear Banana drama,
Why are you so crazy? Why did you put skates on Mr. Tittle Turtle? You are very cute and one day, I hope you travel to the moon

Love,
A

Banana Drama

Banana Drama

BANANA – DRAMA’S REPLY

Yo, A

I am not only crazy but also cool, I am a crazy cool monkey.

I was just helping Mr. Tittle Turtle to walk faster, he is so slow that sometimes by the time he has reached his own birthday party and blown out the candles it is time for his next birthday party and we don’t have so much time like he has. Do you know a turtle can live up to 150 years so he can take things slow but not us monkeys.

I do want to travel to the moon one day but I would like to do it on a full moon night. What if there is half a moon and I land on the dark side, how will I see stuff. And on a night when there is no moon, what if I don’t find it? I think I better ask my science teacher about this, you do that too.

Love,

Banana Drama.
——————————————————————————————————————

LETTER TO CUCKOO ( MELODY’S MOM)

Dear Cuckoo,

You are very pretty. But it is not nice to give your baby to someone else.

Your funniest fan,

A

Cuckoo Cool

Cuckoo Cool

CUCKOO’S
REPLY

My dear A

Thank you! Lots of my fans have told me I am pretty, very pretty. I also have a beautiful voice. Now if you have some talent you have to let it shine. I had to go to King Tweety –Fruity’s kingdom to be a star and a baby would have been a bother. So, I did the best thing for Melody, I left her with Maggie Hatchery.

She is going to have four babies so she can look after one more. Maggie is a good mom so she is in good hands.

Love,

KuuKuuuu.
( this is my star name)

 

 

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THE BIRDS’ TALE ( a children’s play for adults ) to figure this out you have to read the play ! 😁

THE BIRD’S TALE

DRAMATIS PERSONAE

Melody: a little cuckoo bird, our heroine.

Cuckoo: Melody’s mother who had abandoned Melody in Caw-gee’s nest.

Caw-gee: motherly crow with a brood of four.

Do-ray: Caw-gee’s first born, a musician.

Me-Far: a fat crow, younger to Do-ray. He plays the drums.

So-La: the third boy who plays the flute.

Ti-do: the girl crow, who plays the triangle.

Mr. Rabid: Music Tutor to the crows. He wears the Talibani turban and sports a beard, no moustache. This is to distinguish him from the rest of the Muslims of the world who are not rabid.

Senor Julio: a thrush, who is blind.

Gee-Peck: a middle aged peacock who is beautiful but ashamed of his ugly feet which are always clad in big clod-hopping boots. He is a classical Indian dancer. He loves Flow-Jo, the deer.

Flow-Jo: An athlete who is extremely fashion conscious. She loves Gee-Peck. She is middle-aged and is lost in youthful dreams.

Banana-Drama: A rocking monkey who is a Disc Jockey. He wears cool clothes, a bandana on his head, a single ear-ring, black shades and a carries a walk-man. Talks like a black rap singer.

Peter: a parrot.

Laurel/ Hardy: two rabbits.

Butterflies; a few small, a few big.

Kite-King – a king who is inordinately fond of the good life.

Guru God-man: Master of ceremonies,and later,the home minister to Kite-King. He is a crane who never stands on his two feet. He wears a white robe, a saffron shawl and a green Muslim cap (the three colors to show his affiliation to all communities- Hindu, Muslim, Christian). Around his neck he wears a beaded rosary with a cross and a Hindu caste mark on
his fore-head and sports a beard. He wears glasses to show he is erudite.

Dr. Charlie: Court doctor to Kite-King who looks and acts like Charlie Chaplin.

Platy- pus: A contestant from Australia.

Pee-wee-King: A Chinese contestant.

Freezer: The judge who is a penguin. Peace-meal: a pigeon.

Mrs. Brown: a sparrow who is Cuckoo‘s maid. She is very hilly-billy.

Mr. Brown: Mrs. Brown’s alcoholic husband who is down on his luck and so drowns his sorrow in liquor.

Alien: he has come from a galaxy far, far away so can look like nothing on earth. ( or like Steven Spielberg’s E.T. from the film of the same name )

Audience: any number of actors, children or adults can be added to the cast in order to make a statement. The director can give free rein to his creativity.

Set direction: A few golden bars to denote luxury as well as being caged can be placed in Kite-king’s court as well as in Cuckoo’s bed chamber.

THE BIRD’S TALE

ACT 1

SCENE 1

Place: The jungle/Time:An hour before dawn. The jungle sleeps.
Characters: All the animals of the jungle except Kite-King, his courtiers and the contestants from Australia and China

CUCKOO’S VOICE
Ko hoo Ko hoo

As the first rays of the sun touch the
jungle we see Cuckoo tip-toe on to the
stage holding the wing/hand of a little
cuckoo bird.

LITTLE CUCKOO
Mom,Where are you taking me? I am scared.

CUCKOO
Shhhh child, I am only doing what is good for you.
( The little cuckoo weeps )

CUCKOO’S VOICE
Shhhh, Shhhhh.

At one end of the stage is a nest in which dozes Caw-gee along with her brood of four little crows. Cuckoo circles the nest cautiously, pushes the little cuckoo in it and moves stealthily away.

It is morning now. The animals of the jungle are awake. The two rabbits roll on to the stage playfully. A peacock who is wearing huge boots walks in and spreads his feathers and dances in an oriental style. A deer who wears smart trainer shoes munches on grass. The two rabbits dash against the crow’s nest. She opens one eye and looks at them.

LAUREL/HARDY

 (the two rabbits sing)

Good morning, good morning, a very top of the morning to you.

FLOW-JO
(Sings in a very sweet voice )
Good morning.

GEE-PECK
(dancing in an oriental way and
singing)
Dha dha dhin dha, dha, dha, dhin dha, dha tin tin,dha tin
tin ta

ALL THE ANIMALS (together)
Good morning, good morning, a very top of the morning to you.

Caw-Gee shakes the nest to wake her
children and sings.

CAW-GEE
(singing in a raucous voice)
Rise and Shine, O children of Mine,
There’s much to be done and work is fun,
When the work is over it’s time for some leisure
We’ll dance and sing for the jungle folks pleasure.

All the animals look at each other
distressed when she sings the last four
lines. The four crows are shaking their
wings, reluctant to get up.

DO-RAY:Mom,please, please let me sleep.

ME-FAR: Just five minutes more.

TI-DO: There’s no school today.

There is a sound of snoring from SO-LA.
Suddenly CAW-GEE spies the little
cuckoo in her nest.

CAW-GEE
Goodness! Who is this?

She shakes the little cuckoo to wake
her. The little bird yawns and stretches.

CAW-GEE
Who, in the name of heaven, are you?

Little Cuckoo just shakes her head.

CAW-GEE
Are you mute ?

The four crows caw raucously and circle
her. The Little bird shakes her head
again. The jungle creatures look at
each other amazed and then slowly come
towards her.

ME-FAR
(pecking the little cuckoo)
She’s so …B.l.a.c.k.

Do-Ray
She’s so tiny.

TI-DO
(looking at the little cuckoo’s
frightened face)
She’s in a funk.

SO-LA
(pecking the little cuckoo)
Ya, but why don’t you speak. Come on say something.

The little cuckoo bird cries musically.

LITTLE CUCKOO
Kooo hoo boo hooo. Ko hoo boo hoo.
(The four crows shut their ears
with their wings/hands)

DO-RAY
What a rough voice!

Me-Far
Stop crying. My ear drums are about to burst.

So-La
You are so ugly.

Ti-Do
And have an ugly voice. It’s so harsh.

The four crows peck the little cuckoo
who tries to save herself desperately.

GEE-PECK
(whispering to FLOW-JO)
Goodness gracious. They are calling her sweet voice harsh?
Have they ever heard themselves? The jungle is in a tizzy ever since they arrived.

FLOW-JO
True, Mr. Gee-peck. Their cacophony has ruined our peace of mind.

GEE-PECK
Thank your stars Flow-Jo that you are so swift and can run away from their sound of music.
(Looks down at his boot-clad
feet)
Just look at my feet..
(takes out his foot from the
boot)
Do they have any purpose at all…I have to wear these heavy boots just to hide them. I can’t even run away from their din.

The crows are pecking the little
cuckoo. CAW-GEE picks her up and
cradles her in her lap and then turns
on the crows.

CAW-GEE
Stop this nonsense right away. You are not going to harass the poor darling.

The LITTLE CUCKOO cries pathetically.
The crows shut their ears with their
wings.

ME-FAR
All right, all right,Caw, caw, we won’t trouble her. Just tell her to stop the infernal racket.

PETER
(whispering to GEE-PECK)
Ah, the little bird even cries musically.

These words are heard by MR. RABID who has just hopped on to the stage.

MR. RABID (closing his ears)
You call her musical. Her voice is enough to burst anyone’s ear drums. Ribbid!

CAW-GEE
(to the little cuckoo bird)
Don’t cry, my child. I will take care of you.
(she looks angrily at the
crows)
If any of you dare to trouble her, I swear I will..

BANANA-DRAMA
Squeeze their throat. At least we’ll be spared the trauma of their singing. Anyway, I don’t have to listen to them,I have my means.

(He switches on his walk-man
and dances snapping his
fingers.)

LITTLE CUCKOO
Koo hoo Boo hoo, Koo Hoo, Bo hoo, Mommy, Mommy.

CAW-GEE
(wiping the little bird’s
tears)
Don’t cry, little one.
(to the crows)
Shoo, go away. Go and get ready. Can’t you see your music teacher is here.

MR. RABID
Salaam Madam.

All the animal look at each other
distressed and react.

PETER
Music class, nooooo, never…
Gotta run

FLOW-JO
Gotta run

Runs from the stage, followed by Peter.

GEE-PECK
(walking away in a dignified
manner his boots clod hopping
away)
I think we have had enough. There is something known as noise
pollution. This racket is harming the environment. Today I am
going to definitely write to the home-ministry.

He leaves the stage grumbling, followed
by the two rabbits. The monkey is still
dancing with his eyes closed.

CAW-GEE
(taking out the ear phones from
his ears)
What’s going on Banana-Drama. Gitt.

BANANA-DRAMA
Cool it mama. When will you recognise true art? We creative critters are always in a trance. We don’t care what’s happening around us.

CAW-GEE
(pecking him)
Gitt, creative critter my foot, You are just a remix artiste.
I know all about you “types”! Shoo now….

SCENE 2.
SAME TIME/SAME DAY AS SCENE 1.

CHARACTERS: ALL THE CHARACTERS OF SCENE 1.

Mr. Rabid is conducting his music class. The little Cuckoo bird who is now called MELODY is sitting close by. CAW-GEE is knitting a sweater and looks up over her spectacles intermittently. The rest of the animals are hiding behind
rocks, trees, in the grass. As the music class progresses they try various ways to close their ears.

MR. RABID
All right, my pets, let’s begin.

DO-RAY
Dooooooooooooooooooo

FLOW-JO stuffs her ears with
cotton wool)

ME-FAR
Raaaaaaaaaaay
(GEE-PECK puts ear-plugs in his
ears and ties a bandage around
his head.)

SO-LA
Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
(Peter start banging his head
against a tree)

TI-DO
Faa.mmmph Mmmphh
(He wants to sing but PETER’S
hand/wing covers his mouth)

MR. RABID
(opening his hitherto closed eyes)
What happened ? Come on, sing.
(he looks at the creatures of
the jungle running hither- thither)
What in God’s name is happening here? Shoo
Gitt! How dare you interrupt our practice session!
(to the crows)
Never mind, my pets, they are all jealous of you. Never fear, don’t give up.
(to the little cuckoo, Melody)
You there,
(Melody looks at him with huge eyes)
Yes, yes, you. Let’s see how well you can sing. Sing with me.
(He croaks)
Do, ray,me, far, so, la,ti, doooooo

The animals close their ears and make
all sorts of action and faces.

MELODY
(trying to imitate MR. RABID)
Do, ray, me, fa, so, la, ti,dooooooo

MR. RABID
That’s much better. Just keep practising. One day you will learn to sing just like us.

(The animals have moved closer.
MR, RABID now looks at the
crows and says)

MR. RABID
All right then, my pets. Let’s begin.

THE CAW SONG
Caw, caw, caw, we are the crows four.
Loo, loo, loo, looking for a song to bore.
You, you, you, are our audience for sure,
We,we,we,we have trapped you evermore.

We have trapped you evermore,
And we’ll never let you go,
For if we let you go,
Who’ll buy tickets for the show.

No tickets for the show
Means no money for us bores
No money for us bores means
No future for us crows.

No,no,no,no,please see our shows,
So we don’t eat trash anymore,
We live like kings and sleep like stars,
Take Oprah and Paris and Cruise our cars.

Parties and Photos, glitter and glamor,
We have no talent but still we clamor.
For the good life or la dolce vita
Who cares for talent when we have our teacher.
(Here they look at MR. RABID
who hops with excitement)

FADE OUT.

SCENE 3
Place: Another corner of the jungle/ Time: day.

Characters: Melody/Senor Julio who is blind and wearing dark glasses.

Melody is singing a song as she wanders
in the jungle.

SONG
The jungle is alive with the sound of music.
If music be the food of love,
love is all I need.
If need is the future of music,
I can do without it,yes sir,indeed.
In deed I will pray,
In prayers I will say,
Give me only music,
only music to share.

As she sings and twirls and hops she
bumps into a brown bird who is wearing
dark glasses.

MELODY
Goodness,couldn’t you see me ?

SENOR JULIO
No,child. I am blind.

MELODY
Oh! I am sorry.

SENOR JULIO
It’s okay. You are beautiful, child.

MELODY
But,but,I am….
(she looks at herself and then
at SENOR JULIO)
How do you know, you can’t see.

SENOR JULIO
To see you don’t need eyes. A good heart is enough and I can see you with them, my child. I heard you singing but..Can you come closer?

Melody goes near SENOR JULIO who
touches her face with his wings/hands.

SENOR JULIO
Beautiful.
Very beautiful but…..
(his hand/wings linger at her throat)

MELODY
That’s not ..I mean that’s my neck.

SENOR JULIO
I know let me finish what I am saying. Your throat is sensitive but there’s something missing here.

MELODY
(sadly)
I know MR. RABID also says that. He says I do not know how to sing.

SENOR JULIO
Well child,, if he says that you should be happy. If you sing like him the audience will pelt you with rotten tomatoes and eggs. I didn’t mean you can’t sing.

MELODY
Then what did you mean?

SENOR JULIO
I meant your throat is weak. It is sensitive but it lacks strength.

MELODY
Oh, what should I do for that Mr.

SENOR JULIO
(bowing low)
Senor Julio at your service, my child. For that you have to train your voice.

MELODY
(wailing)
Oh what should I do. Who will train me?
(Then looking hopefully at
Senor Julio)
Will you train me?

SENOR JULIO
Of course, child. But on one condition.

MELODY
What condition?

SENOR JULIO
That you will tell no one about me except your mother.

MELODY
Done. I won’t tell anyone.

SENOR JULIO
All right then. Lets make a beginning right away.
(Both sing, first SENOR JULIO
followed by MELODY)

SONG
SEVEN NOTES OF MUSIC( from the film Sound of Music)

Doe a deer, a female deer,ray, a drop of golden sun,
Me,a name I call myself,Far a long,long way to run.
So,a needle pulling thread, la,a note to follow so.
Tea, a drink with jam and bread, that will bring us back to
Do, o, o, o, Doe,a deer a female deer…..

FADE OUT.

ACT 2.
SCENE 1.
Place: KITE-KING’S Court/Time:Night.

Characters: Kite-King, Cuckoo-Melody’s mother, courtiers.

KITE-KING is seated on a throne and
CUCKOO is dancing and singing.)

SONG
I could have danced all night.
(From the film MY Fair Lady)

Cuckoo takes a final twirl, loses her
balance and falls.

KITE-KING
Watch out! Did you get hurt?

CUCKOO
(Gets up, places her hand on her
hips and limps a bit)
Oh no, Sire, Just a little sprain.

KITE-KING
I have told you again and again and again that you are not as young as before. It’s high time you retired so that we can get a new court dancer.
(From Cuckoo’s expression we can see that she does not like the idea.)
All right, let’s get this message across that we are going to hold a huge contest and whoever wins is going to get lots of goodies.

CUCKOO
Yes, Your highness, Kite- King.

She limps out of the court with a sour
expression on her face.

KITE-KING
(to one of the courtiers)
See that the message is proclaimed to every nook and corner of the world. Cuckoo is really very crafty. Given half a chance she would even tell me to go fly a kite.

All the courtiers laugh uproariously.

ONE OF THE COURTIERS
Ha ha. That’s funny what his royal highness, the Kite- King just said. Cuckoo is capable of telling him to go fly a kite.
(laughs)

FADE OUT.

SCENE 2.
Place: The jungle/Time:day
Characters: All the inhabitants of the jungle.

The younger animals have grown up. Do-Ray holds a guitar and is the lead singer, Me-Far is on the drums, So-La plays the flute from which instrument emanates a variety of sounds
intermittently and Ti-Do beats her metal triangle with a small rod. All the crows are singing THE CAW SONG. Mr. Rabid
has a long white beard and wears spectacles. All the creatures of the jungle are dancing to THE CAW SONG.

BANANA-DRAMA
Not bad, I am going to remix this number.

PETER
When will you stop your monkey tricks and stop being a copy cat. It’s very confusing, all this remix and stuff.

Gee-Peck is dancing and by mistake
steps on Flow-Jo’s toes.

FLOW-JO
Ouch, ouch,ouch! Your huge boots have squashed my big toe.

GEE-PECK
Ooops! sorry! sorry! I am so sorry. But you know my problem, don’t you?

The rabbits are also hopping to the
music. Melody brings some snacks for
everyone.

MELODY
It’s tea time and snacks for everyone.

There are carrots for the rabbits, a long, green chilly for the parrot, a few spinach leaves for the deer and for the peacock there are some brown noodles that look like earth worms. For the butterflies they are some flowers with a straw stuck in the center of each flower. For the crows there are pizzas, burgers and colas. All the creatures eat and drink.

MR. RABID
Ladies and gentlemen creatures. I see that you like our music.

LAUREL
(to Hardy)
Do we have choice in the matter?
(Twisting both his ears with a
painful expression)
Well, it hardly matters now. My ear drums are completely shattered.

HARDY
(to Laurel)
Yes, just like a snake you know. He can’t hear too, just moves along with the snake charmer’s pipe.

GEE-PECK
(who has a brown noodle
dangling from his beak)
Snake? Who said snake? Where’s the snake?

All the animals are shocked into
silence.

MR. RABID
(looks scared and looks around)
Where’s the snake? Snake’s are my mortal enemies.

CAW-GEE
(throws a hard stare in
Laurel/Hardy’s direction,then
speaks soothingly to Mr.
Rabid)
There’s no snake around. Don’t worry Mr. Rabid. If a snake dares to come here Gee- peck here will eat him up for dinner.

The noodles are still hanging from Gee-
Peck’s beak. All the animals look at
him.

BANANA-DRAMA
Yes,well, let him eat his noodles first. When the snake comes he will eat him as well.

GEE-PECK
Gross. I am not like other pea-cocks who eat snakes. Snakes are our friends actually. They eat up all the animals who are pests like rats,fro…
(Peter quickly shuts his mouth
with his hands/wings)

MR. RABID
(puffing with anger)
What did you say? I know what you were going to say. Frogs. Snakes eat pests like frogs.

PETER
(giggling)
No, no. You are quite mistaken sir. How can you be our enemy?
You sing so sweetly. Ah, what a melodious voice.

MR. RABID
(cooling down a bit)
All right, all right. There is no need to butter me up. I know you critters like the back of my tongue. You make fun of me and (points to the crows) and my pupils. Now just wait and see, I am going to teach you all a lesson you’ll never forget.

CAW-GEE
(nodding her head)
Yes, to be sure. Mr. Rabid is entering my children in a competition at the court of Kite-King. The winner will be made the court-singer. Later, there is talk of getting a good pension.

PETER
(to a butterfly)
Nothing can beat a good job in the government. Just eat, drink and be merry. No stress!

BUTTERFLY ONE
(flapping her wings)
Betcha ! Now take me for instance. I work in the State Department. All I have to do is fly here and fly there -in the country, out of the country and all for free. No worries man.

CAW-GEE
All right then. It is decided. We are all going to Kite-King’s court to encourage our group. Mr. Rabid has named the band – THE CAW-DOORS BAND.

BANANA-DRAMA
Dude, what kind of a name is that? So old and boring.

GEE-PECK
(whispers to Flow-Jo)
Just like their teacher.

Mr. Rabid over hears this remark and
starts to puff up with anger.

MR. RABID
I heard what you said. So I am old and boring! Ribbid!Ribbid!

CAW-GEE
(distressed)
Mr. Rabid ! Control your self. You have to watch your blood
pressure. You might…..

BANANA-DRAMA
(to Flow-jo)
Burst like a big, fat balloon.

Flow-Jo laughs and then tries to stifle her laughter.

MR. RABID
(in a wild temper now)
Go on laugh away. You, modern, fashionable folks can do little else. What else do you know except to bare your teeth and grin like apes.
(Banana-drama can react here)

CAW-GEE
Get a hold on yourself Mr. Rabid. Please don’t be angry with them. They are all jealous of your talent. I am sure your pupils will get the first prize. That will shut them up.

DO-RAY
Yes, sir, please don’t worry. We are sure to make you famous all over the world.

ME-FAR
The world of music will remember you for ever and for ever.

TI-DO
And we’ll be big stars too. Everyone will look at us and sing, Twinkle, twinkle little stars,

SO-LA
How I wonder what you are.

CROWS
(together)
Twinkle, twinkle little star,how I wonder what you are.

MELODY
Mom, I want to be a star too.

The crows are silent and look at each other.

DO-RAY
No way Jose.

ME-FAR
You, don’t know how to sing. Everyone will laugh at you.

TI-DO
And then, no one’s going to take us seriously too because you are tagging along with us.

MELODY (crying)
Ko hooo, Boo, hoo.

CAW-GEE
Oh, Melody. Don’t cry baby. You will take part in the contest. I’ll see who dares stop you from participating.

Mr. Rabid who had opened his mouth to
say something shuts it hastily.

SO-LA
Mom, if she wants to be a part of the contest she can but only after we are done.

CAW-GEE
Why so ?

SO-LA
Because, if the audience runs away after hearing her song who is going to listen to us then,duh!

TI-DO
Don’t be mean So-La!

SO-LA
(to Melody)
Melody, you can help us okay, back-stage, but don’t you dare open your beak to sing.

CAW-GEE
Stop it, all of you. If Melody wants to be in the contest she’s going to get her chance too.

GEE-PECK
(to Flow-Jo)
Yes, one must dance when one gets the chance. I think I will take part in the contest too. After all, I am trained classical dancer from India.
(Flow-Jo bats her eye lashes)

BANANA-DRAMA
And I think I will present a couple of my items too. How long can I hide my talent from the world!

MR. RABID
This contest is not for grinning apes and copy cats.

GEE-PECK
And why not? If tuneless and ugly artistes can participate then why not copy cats?

MR. RABID
Ribbid! Ribbid! Hold your tongue you mangy bird or I will tear and crush your beautiful feathers which you so proudly display.

GEE-PECK
Are you capable of anything else? You are jealous of me because neither do you have looks, nor talent. All you know is to croak in the rains- ribbid, ribbid, and that’s what you are teaching these poor crows.

MR. RABID
(angrily)
Oh, I see. So that’s what you think of me. I am not going to leave any of you. You will all have to pay for this insult.

CAW-GEE
(desperately trying to calm Mr.
Rabid)
Mr. Rabid, calm down, please calm down or you will get sick.

BANANA-DRAMA
(to Peter)
I hope he goes for a long spell to the hospital. Then we can have some peace and quiet in the jungle. He is such a bore. I am sick to my teeth of his infernal racket.

MR. RABID
Ribbid! Ribbid! The cheek of this monkey. He wants to send me to the hospital. I am going to fix him first.

CAW-GEE
Mr. Rabid! Please, pretty please, calm down. We should all live in the jungle in peace and quiet.

MR. RABID
Now there is going to be peace and quiet after I have taught each one of these creatures a lesson and kicked them out of the jungle.

BANANA-DRAMA
And what if we all got together and threw you out, then what are you going to do?

MR. RABID
Ribbid!Ribbid!

CAW-GEE
(to all the creatures)
Be quiet,all of you. Who told you creatures to poke your nose in our affairs. Apologize to Mr. Rabid at once. You have hurt his feelings.

BANANA-DRAMA
And what about him. He has shattered the peace and quiet of the jungle, what about that, huh?

BUTTERFLY ONE
Yes, and once when I was flying a little low he flicked his long tongue and tried to catch me. I was so scared, I swear.

MR.RABID
Come on, you liar.

BUTTERFLY TWO
No, of course not I am telling the truth.
(Addressing the other butterflies)
Ask them, aren’t I telling the truth?

All the butterflies nod their heads vigorously.

BUTTERFLIES
True, absolutely true. He hides in the grass and whenever he gets the chance he flicks out his tongue to catch us.

Caw- gee looks at Mr. Rabid.

MR. RABID
(trying to cover his
discomfiture)
What’s got into these butterflies?
(Looking at Banana-Drama)
This is all this monkey’s tricks to throw me out of the jungle. He has no talent to speak of and that’s why he is envious of me.

BANANA-DRAMA
Just exactly what talent do you have dude? You have one talent and that you don’t need air to puff up like a balloon but all I have to do is stick a pin in you and you will deflate – Whooooooooooosh.

All the animals laugh uproariously and
Mr. Rabid hops up and down and says
“Ribbid” Ribbid” many times.

Caw-Gee claps her hand/wings and says
peremptorily

CAW-GEE
(Clapping her wings/hands)
Peace, peace.
(Addressing all the creatures)
What has got in to all of you? Is this your culture? Is this civilized?

PETER
Culture and Civilization can boil themselves in oil, for all we care, Madam. I mean, everything has its limits. And this critter here has crossed all limits. And now we are not going to keep quiet. We are going to shout and scream and burst his ear drums so that he knows too what we go through day in and day out.

CAW-GEE
(brings her hand/wings together
to pacify him)
Brothers, I beg you, put an end to this quarrel. Look, the sun is about to set. It’s time to sleep peacefully in our homes. The morrow’s sun will bring a new day when we can live in peace and harmony with each other.

GEE-PECK
That’s is possible only if this critter here refrains from shattering the peace of the jungle or we restrain him.

CAW-GEE
No, no, no, my friends. Please be patient. He is just a little hot tempered but he is very warm-hearted other wise.
He will make our jungle famous one day, you wait and watch.

PETER
Caw-nee,( pronouncing it as corny) I mean Caw-Gee. You are partial to him today but one day you are going to regret this. He will take a deep breath and plunge into the water leaving you to face the music.

CAW-GEE
Don’t say that, my son. He is an artiste and artistes are very simple.

PETER
He’s not simple, he’s a pimple, an ugly boil on the face of the earth but by the time you realize this it may be too late.

CAW-GEE
(bringing her wings/hand
together in the attitude of a
judge)
Order, order. Or you will be behind bars for disturbing the
peace of the community.

LAUREL (to Hardy)
Behind bars. Whatever is that?

HARDY
It means to drink so much that you can’t see what is right and what is wrong. You are cool with everything, even their singing.

LAUREL/HARDY
But, we don’t mind looking at them, we just don’t want to hear them, especially when they start singing.

GEE-PECK
What are you both muttering about? To throw behind bars means to send you to jail, to lock you up, to put you in the slammer.

LAUREL/HARDY
(together)
Ooooooooh! Who does Caw-Gee want to lock up ?

PETER
Caw- Gee wants to lock all of us up because she wants her kids to be stars and since we don’t like their music she feels humiliated.

HARDY

I see. If Caw-Gee wants her kids to be stars the what will Mr. Rabid be ?

BANANA-DRAMA
Well, he’s round and full, so he’s a moon, dude.

FLOW-JO
No way, The moon’s too good for him, he’s just a pumpkin, the one you see on Halloween.

All the animals laugh uproariously. Mr.
Rabid hops up and down, furious.

MR. RABID
Ribbid, ribbid .

LAUREL
(To Hardy)
Why does he keep croaking ribbid, ribbid? What does it mean?

HARDY
It means that when you don’t know what you want to say you cover it up by jumping up and down and shouting  ribbid, ribbid.

GEE-PECK
No, no, Ribbid means….

MELODY
Koooooooo

CAW-GEE
Yes, yes, my child I completely forgot where the matter all began and look, where it has all ended. I am sorry to say the world is not too kind to a single mom who is only trying to do what’s best for her children.

FLOW-JO

No, non, Caw-Gee, that’s not true. We are all happy for Do- ray, Me-far, So-la and Ti-do but….

GEE-PECK
But, we only object to a certain individual who is only wants to confuse you so he can get what he wants.

BANANA-DRAMA
Ya man, Kaw-Nee ( pronounced Corny), I mean Kaw-Gee. We are  all talented man in our own way. But, suppose someone is not talented and the other person tries to thrust talent down his throat then that’s not cool, man.

MR. RABID
(jumping up and down angrily)
How can you say that, you ape, that my pupils have no talent.
I’ll show you. What do you know about talent, anyway, you copy cat!

Mr. Rabid’s eyes are bulging with anger and his tongue is lolling out.

BANANA-DRAMA
Careful dude, watch your step man or I’ll pull out your tongue which helps to put food in your stomach. I ( pointing to Caw-gee) was talking to her, not to you.

MR. RABID
(cooling down)
What do you mean? I didn’t understand.

BANANA-DRAMA
I was telling her that she has thrust the title of artiste on you when you don’t have no talent man.

MR. RABID
What did you say? I don’t have any talent. For your information I won the first prize in a huge musical show.

GEE-PECK
We know all about that. It was just a show for frogs and that too during the monsoon when all the creatures were hiding from the rains.

BANANA-DRAMA
And to top it, all the frogs find a well so that no other creature can participate in the contest.

FLOW-JO (giggling)
Fair- weather frogs , oops, I mean rainy- weather frogs find a deep well and croak away to glory and then pat each other on the backs and divide the prize amongst themselves.

PETER
Yup, these kind of shenanigans are the speciality of film festivals and award functions. They are one big family who award each other at the function and then come back happily to party the night away.

GEE-PECK
Yes, and the rest of the world can boil themselves in oil, for all they care.

MR. RABID
What is this boil in oil, boil in oil, that you go on about?

GEE-PECK
Oh, the whole world moves on oiled wheels, don’t you know that? Oil is really important. If there is no oil, the whole world will come to a stand still. But what do these frogs care? They are just happy croaking away!

MR. RABID
Ribbid! RIBBID !

GEE-PECK
Exactly!

LAUREL/HARDY
But what does ribbid mean?

MELODY
Kooooo
(all the creatures look at her)

CAW-GEE
Yes, my child, you will be in the contest too.

ALL THE CROWS
Mom!

CAW-GEE
Quiet, all of you. If Melody wants to compete in the contest, then she is going to get her chance.

ALL THE CROWS
No way Mom! What will everyone think?

CAW-GEE
Quiet,not a word from you. Aren’t you ashamed of yourselves?
(To Melody)
You start your practise, child.

(She leaves, shaking her head,grumbling
to her self.)

To bring up children is quite a task. It’s not easy being a single mom.

The crows peck Melody and she runs from
the stage cooing away. The other animals, except Mr. Rabid, follow her.
Mr. Rabid hops in the other direction.
Midway he stops and addresses the audience.

MR. RABID
Did all you folks note their behavior? Well, I am not going to spare them. I am going to teach them a lesson come what may. The sky can fall or the earth can shake I will not rest till I teach them a lesson. I too have a weapon that they
know not. Now, all of you just wait for the explosion!

He hops off. Suddenly there is a loud
crash and we hear Mr. Rabid’s loud voice shouting Ribbid)

MR. RABID (O.S.)
Who put this tub of water in the way? I am soaking wet.

BANANA-DRAMA (O.S.)
This is for you Mr. Rabid. You need to have a good wash before you compete with us.

MR. RABID
Ribbid! Ribbid!

The sound of laughter of all the jungle folks.

SCENE 3
PLACE:A CORNER OF THE JUNGLE/DAY

CHARACTERS:ALL THE ANIMALS OF THE JUNGLE EXCEPT MR. RABID,CAW-
GEE, AND THE FOUR CROWS. MELODY SITS IN THE CORNER.

Gee-Peck is dances in an oriental way
while Laurel and Hardy play a
percussion instrument from India-
the tabla

GEE-PECK
Dha,dha,tirkit, ta dha, krandha,krandha,tirkit, tirkit, ta tha.

All the animals clap enthusiastically.

BANANA-DRAMA
Cool, very cool. No, no, I mean, hot, very hot.

FLOW-JO
(laughing)
You better decide whether Mr. Gee-Peck’s dance is cool or hot.

HARDY
I think it’s neither cool nor hot it looks like he is playing the fool.

ALL THE ANIMALS
Whaaaaaaaaaaat!

HARDY
Well, if Mr. Gee Peck is gonna dance with such huge boots it’s not our dance but kinda like a tap dance.

BUTTERFLY ONE
Tap dance, whatever is that?

LAUREL
We had seen it when we had gone abroad once. The dancers wore huge boots and were dancing. And very fast too.

GEE-PECK
Oh well, compared to them I am a nothing. Neither here nor there.

FLOW-JO
Why don’t you just present a demo. Don’t take part in the competition.

PETER
Then who is going to represent us? We do need to teach Mr. Rabid a good lesson.

Everybody is thinking.

MELODY
Coooooo

All the animals look towards her.

MELODY (cont’d)
Will all of you give me a chance to sing on your behalf?

BANANA-DRAMA
But can you sing? You have a sweet voice but professional training is what you need.

MELODY
I have trained professionally. But I can’t reveal the name of  the maestro. It’s top secret.

PETER
All right, in that case why don’t you sing and let us decide.

ALL THE ANIMALS (together)
Hear! hear! let us hear you.

MELODY
All right.

She comes to the center of the stage
and sings.

SONG
The hills are alive with the sound of music.
(from the film Sound of Music)

She sings a few lines and then stops. The animals are quiet
for a moment and then clap enthusiastically and
shout”hear,hear,” and “bravo”!

GEE-PECK
Wonderful! What a melodious voice! Perfectly in tune and rhythm.

BANANA-DRAMA
Rocking! Simply rocking!

FLOW-JO
All right then, it is decided. Melody will represent us.

ALL THE ANIMALS
(all together)
Yes,yes.

PETER
All right Melody. You have to win the first prize. We’ll never get a chance like this one to teach Mr. Rabid a good lesson.

MELODY
All that is fine but let’s not forget my brother’s are also taking part in the contest. If I win they are going to feel bad.

FLOW-JO
Well, just listen to the wee bird. Everyone takes part in the contest,girl. But, this must be the first time I am hearing that someone is afraid to take part in the contest for fear of winning!

BANANA-DRAMA
That happens only when the results are “fixed” as to who is to win and who is to lose. Then it is smarter to lose for if you dare to win you could lose your life.

FLOW-JO
Yes, but this contest is not one of those ones for the Kite- King genuinely wants an entertainer for his court,whether it be a singer or a dancer.

PETER
And,not only are you a good singer but you dance well too. I have seen you hopping from branch to branch,from tree to tree.

FLOW-JO (singing operatically)
I could have danced all night…
(she sings two lines of the
song from the film My Fair Lady)

GEE-PECK
(sings where she breaks off)
You could have danced all night…..

They look at each other lovingly while
the animals look at each other.

PETER
All right, all right, the two of you. How long do you intend to live in the past?

BANANA-DRAMA
Ya man. You gotta swing with the times dude.
(he snaps his fingers and
dances and sings)

SONG
Fly, robin fly
Fly, robin fly
Fly, robin fly
Up, up to the sky
Fly, robin fly
Fly, robin fly
Fly, robin fly Up, up to the sky
(from the group Silver Convention)

Just then a pigeon flutters towards
them. All the animals look at each
other amazed

PEACE-MEAL
(the pigeon)
I have brought you a proclamation from Kite -King.

GEE-PECK
Go ahead.

PEACE-MEAL
The Kite-King wants you all to know that you are all welcome to his land but no one is permitted to bring their tutor or teacher with them.

Just then Caw-gee and Mr. Rabid arrive.

BANANA-DRAMA
Oh Caw-nee, I mean Caw-Gee! He has just brought an important message from the King that Mr. Rabid is not permitted in the
contest.

CAW-GEE
Why Not? What kind of rule is that?

PEACE-MEAL
This is not a rule, it’s the law. The contestants cannot be accompanied by their tutors.

MR. RABID
Stuff and nonsense. I am going to go, let me see who dare stop me.

PEACE-MEAL
You are not going to get a visa.

MR. RABID
Why won’t you give me one? What kind of law is this? You can’t do this.

GEE-PECK
Listen, my good fellow, it’s their country, they can do whatever they want.

MR. RABID
I’ll see who will stop me from entering the country. I have my ways.

FLOW-JO
God forbid. Illegal alien. Are you going to break the law?

MR. RABID
Well, by hook or by crook, whatever it takes.

GEE-PECK
Why are you so stubborn Mr. Rabid? And why do you want to force yourself everywhere, even when you are not wanted.
After all, you must be having a place of your own. Why don’t you go and live there peacefully?

BANANA-DRAMA
Well, the fact is his well is very deep and the water’s are very shallow and murky. And there are many frogs like him who go ribbid, ribbid all the time. That’s why this dude has run away and come here.

PETER
Well if he has run away and come here then he needs to sit quietly in a corner. Where’s the need to go ribbid, ribbid all the time.

GEE-PECK
Force of habit, my friend, force of habit.

MR. RABID
Ribbid, ribbid.

CAW-GEE
Mr. Rabid, don’t you bother about what they all say. Peace, my friend, peace.

PEACE-MEAL
Did you say some thing to me ?

CAW-GEE
I said Peace.

PEACE-MEAL
Yes, that’s my name Peace-Meal. In short, Peace.

ALL THE ANIMALS
Whaaaaaaaaat?

PEACE-MEAL
Yes, I am the pigeon of Peace. Another bird was in charge of this work but ever since the hunters have got rid of her I am now in charge of this work.

BANANA-DRAMA
I see. Yes, the dove was the messenger of peace but now he is extinct like the dodo bird. And now you are in charge of this work.

PEACE-MEAL
Yes, and now I am going to fly off too. Farewell.

He flies away.

All the animals sing

SONG
Fly, robin, fly…

BANANA-DRAMA (to Mr. Rabid)
Well, you better live in peace in the jungle. We’ll take a quick tour of the world and come, man.

GEE-PECK
And if you get too bored you still have your well where the other frog’s await you.

MR. RABID
Ribbid!Ribbid! Looks like you are not going to behave yourselves. Go fly a kite.

BANANA-DRAMA
Hellooo, we are going to meet the Kite-King. How can we fly a kite here?

All the animals laugh uproariously at his joke.

GEE-PECK
Great joke! We can’t fly a kite here coz we are going to meet the Kite-King!! Ho Ho Ho. Well said Banana-Drama.

Banana-Drama pulls up his collar and smirks.

CAW-GEE
Melody, what are you doing here this late. Come into the nest. It’s time to go to bed. We have to leave early tomorrow.
(Addressing the other animals)
Come along, all of you too.

BANANA-DRAMA
No way Mam. I was thinking of going to the disco. I have just got a new job as the D.J. I have to play all the latest hit songs.

CAW-GEE
You have to play, that’s all. Anyone can do that for you, they don’t need you for that. Go. Go to sleep, or you will all miss the flight tomorrow.

BANANA-DRAMA
All right Caw-Nee, I mean Caw-Gee. We respect you, that is why we listen to you Mam or
(looking at Mr. Rabid)
By this time we would have got rid of certain individuals.

Goes away singing “Black is black,
I want my baby back”by Los Bravos)

Mr. Rabid looks at him furiously. All the animals leave.
Only Mr. Rabid remains on stage.

MR. RABID
We’ll see who will get rid of whom. I will destroy all of  you. I have a secret weapon and that weapon is going to spell your doom.

FADE TO BLACK.

SCENE 4.
PLACE: CUCKOO’S LUXURIOUS BED CHAMBER WHICH IS FURNISHED WITH A FEW GOLDEN RODS TO DENOTE LUXURY AND THE FEELING OF BEING CAGED/ TIME:NIGHT

CHARACTERS: CUCKOO/A PIGEON/MRS. BROWN/MELODY

Cuckoo is pacing the floor. There is a
knock on the door.
CUCKOO’S VOICE
Come in
(A pigeon comes in and bows
before Cuckoo.)
Did you do what I told you to do?

PIGEON
Yes madam,I told both my friends to keep an eye on the contestants and to let me know who among them is the best.

CUCKOO
And?

PIGEON
According to my sources the most talented of the lot is a young singer named Melody.

CUCKOO
All right then, go and invite her. Tell her I want to meet her tomorrow, in the evening. Tell her I want to give her tips to help her win the contest.

PIGEON (bowing respectfully)
To be sure Madam.

(Goes away)

CUCKOO
(putting her wings/hand
together)
Wants to replace me, indeed! We’ll see about that. I am going to teach her such a lesson that she‘ll go crying to her mamma. After I am done with her she’ll not even be able to eat, forget about tweet.
(she claps peremptorily)
Where is everyone? Yoohooo, I say, yoohoo.

A little sparrow comes in running.

MRS. BROWN
Yes Madam

CUCKOO
Are you deaf Mrs. Brown? Your problem is that you are hopping here and there all the time and when there is work to be done you are nowhere to be seen.

MRS. BROWN
(wringing her hands in fear)
Yes madam, to be sure madam. I had just gone to collect some grains and grit                                ( gives a shy smile)                                                    I am expecting five wee ones soon and we’ll need a bigger nest too. Hubby dear can’t do all the house work, he has to work outside too to make ends meet.

CUCKOO
(sarcastically)
I know exactly what he does outside. When are you folks going to change your ways? Your husband has no work, he’s always drunk in bars and you, you go on producing children. What’s your husband’s name?

MRS. BROWN
(lowers her eyes shyly clasps
her hand and swings side to
side)
Mr. Lancelot Brown.

CUCKOO
Whatever! Go and tell Mr. Hadalot to take a break and come and meet me right away. I have some work for him.

MRS. BROWN
Right away Missus (Cuckoo glares at her) I mean madame.

CUCKOO
Now off with you. Go and get me a few grains and salad leaves. And, bring me a cold glass of water.

MRS. BROWN
(who is a little slow-witted)
To drink ?

CUCKOO (exasperated)
No, to have a bath! Oh God, give me strength that I can deal with these slow witted and hilly billy sorts. Now, go, O mother of mine, go and do as I say.

MRS. BROWN
Mother? I am not your mother. I am going to be a mother soon.
(Shyly)
Just a few days to go.

CUCKOO
(stamping her feet)
Are you going to leave or no!

The sparrow hops away

(Cuckoo draws in a deep breath)
What a life! On the one hand I have to deal with these dumb hilly billy sorts and on the other I have to deal with that rogue Kite-King who has no other interest in life but to sing, dance and be merry.                                           Just because I am a little old, I mean a little mature now, he is scouting around for young blood. He has one leg in the grave but he behaves like a young rooster. Anyway, I can handle him and his new singing sensation, what did pigeon say was her name, ah Yes! Melody.

Fade to black for a few moments to indicate that it is the next day and then we hear’s Melody’s voice.

MELODY’S VOICE
Kooooooo

Lights come on gradually. Melody is
standing on one corner of the stage.

Cuckoo is on the settee in a dishevelled state

MELODY
Madam you called me so here I am. I am a big fan, Madam. Your songs are an inspiration to me.

CUCKOO
(Yawning)
Really! You are so little then how can you be a big fan?
(Giggling)
Just a joke. Come in, come and sit down.
(Pats the settee)
Come here, come sit next to me.

Melody sits next to her, a little
scared, a little nervous.

CUCKOO
Now then, tell me, where did you learn to sing. I mean, who is your teacher?

MELODY’S VOICE
(as she thinks)
Senor Julio told me to tell no one but
(addresses Cuckoo)
Mother had appointed Mr. Rabid to tutor all of us.

CUCKOO
(taken aback)
Mr. Rabid! That tuneless frog who goes ribbid, ribbid in the rainy weather.

MELODY
The same.

CUCKOO
Lordloveaduck!

CUCKOO’S VOICE
(as she thinks to herself)
Did that pigeon make a mistake? How can she be a good singer?
(Addresses Melody)
All right, let me hear you, let me see how you sing.

MELODY
I am sorry, the maestro forbid from singing in front of anyone.

CUCKOO
Drat it! All right, at least let me hear you sing the seven notes of melody, just like Mr. Ribbid taught you to sing.

MELODY
Just like Mr. Ribbid taught me to sing. All right.
(she sings hoarsely)
Do, Ray, Me, Far, So, La, Ti, Do.

CUCKOO
(gives an evil smile)
Hear, hear! What a voice. Wonderful, my child. You will surely win the first prize in this contest.
(Joyfully)
Will you eat something?
(Claps her hands peremptorily)
Mrs. Brown, yoohoo,Mrs. Brown, are you deaf?

Mrs Brown who is wearing an apron and has a duster in which she is wiping her hands comes in running.

MRS. BROWN
Yes Missus
(Cuckoo glares at her)
I mean Madame

CUCKOO
Go and get a cola with ice for her. And get me some hot tea and don’t forget the ginger.

MRS. BROWN
(as she goes )
Yes missus
(flustered)
I mean Madame

The lights are slowly dimming as we hear Melody.

MELODY’S VOICE
My teacher told me not drink anything cold. And definitely not any cola. It has chemicals that kill bugs.

CUCKOO
Drat it!

FADE TO BLACK.

SCENE 5. A
PLACE: KITE-KING’S COURT IN HIS PALACE/ TIME:NIGHT

CHARACTERS:KITE-KING/CUCKOO/JUDGE-A FAT PENGUIN/ALL THE ANIMALS OF JUNGLE LAND/AUDIENCE WHICH CAN ALSO COMPRISE OF ANY BIRDS,BEASTS OR HUMANS THROUGH WHICH ONE MAY WANT TO MAKE A STATEMENT, AN ALIEN WHO HAS COME FROM ANOTHER GALAXY/MR. LANCELOT BROWN, MRS. BROWN AND THEIR FIVE CHILDREN/GURU GODMAN.

Kite-king comes and sits on his throne.
The audience claps

KITE-KING
Let the contest begin.

The Master of ceremonies is a crane. He holds the mike. He stands on one foot then the other.

GURU GODMAN
Salaam,Namaste,Good Evening! Ich bin ein Guru Godman and welcome you all. The Kite-King, in all his benevolence, has organized this contest magnifique for all of us to enjoy.
Tres bien. Now, I will call on each contestant to come one by one and I hope you will enjoy their performance. So, first let me invite.. ( looks at his paper)

PETER (to Gee-Peck)
Why doesn’t he speak in one language,it’s very confusing.

GEE-PECK
So, he can please everyone.

GURU GODMAN
The first contestant tonight is China’s famous singer,
(looking at a paper in his hands)
Who is also trained in the martial arts like judo karate,Pee- Wee- King.

Everyone claps and Pee-Wee-King comes
on stage and sings in the Chinese Style
and also demonstrates Judo and karate.

PEE-WEE-KING
(Sings in a falsetto)
Chop, chop, chop,chop suey.
Pop, pop, pop, pop goes the weasel.

Top, top, top, top of the Morning,

Cop, cop, cop, cop out come evening.

Come morning, come evening,
By day and by night,
Buy, buy, buy our motto,
And sell, sell, sell,
When the time is right.
Buy and sell, buy and sell,
Do we care wherever we dwell.
All we want is the ship to sail,
We’ll bail out when the going is hell.
The song concludes and everyone claps.

LAUREL (to Hardy)
He looks like a boy then why does he sing like a girl? And his name is Pee-Wee-King. Is he small or is he a King? And why does he exercise when he sings? I am so confused.

GEE-PECK
So is he. And that is his problem. He can’t decide what he wants, what he wants to be and where he is going? I guess he’ll make up his mind when the going is hell.

GURU GODMAN
And now is the turn of the famous bird from Australia – Platy- Pus.

A weird looking bird comes on stage.

LAUREL
Now what kind of bird is this, I just can’t figure it out.

PETER
Nor can it. It hasn’t decided what it wants to be, a bird or a beast. So its neither here nor there – just a Platy-pus.

LAUREL
That Chinese man should also decide what it wants to be or it will turn out like this creature-neither here nor there- just a Platy-pus

PLATY-PUS
(Singing)
Fowl is fair and Fair is Fowl
Live we do not cheek by jowl.
Open spaces,weather fair,
Plenty to eat and not a care.
Confused are we and do not dare
To take a stand and show them all
We mean business and will not stick
Any funny business before we kick
All and sundry from our land.
No, no. no, no, yes, yes, yes, yes.
No-yes, no-yes, no- yes, no-yes,
Confused are we, we are confused,
Lord clear the heads of these Platy-pus.

All the creatures clap. We see a short
rotund individual clad from top to toe
in a burqa/abaya coming in. He stands
in a corner. This is Mr. Rabid.

GURU GODMAN
And now we call on stage four talented singers from the jungle- Do-ray, Me-far, So-la, Ti-do, to present their song  titled, Black is Black.

The creatures clap and the four crows
come on stage lugging their instruments
which they place with stylized swagger
and superior attitude.

FOUR CROWS
(singing in a rap style)
Black is black and so is white.
Day is day and so is night.
If black is white and day is night
What does it matter if we look a sight,
What does it matter if we give you a fright,
What does it matter if you want us out of sight.
We may be bores
but now-a-days
anything goes.
If anything goes
than what does it matter
If we are not sure of our tunes or our pater.
We follow the credo of all our kind
To stiff the suckers who pay to watch
Our shows and our broadsides divine.
If they now complain,
We’ll not return their money
come thunder or rain.
No, no, that’s not our intention,
No,no,we’ll not allow any intervention,
We want our money
and we’ll hold it tight,
Nothing will cure us,
not even a swift kick
Up our backsides.

At the beginning of the song the
audience is too stunned to react. Then,
they slowly start to close their ears.
Some of them are trying to get out of
the hall. The Kite-King is flapping his
wings in anger. The Guru-Godman hastily
comes on stage. Only the alien is
clapping appreciatively.

GURU GODMAN
Yes, yes, to be sure. I think that is enough for the night.
Due to time constraints we’ll have to cut short this number. We apologize.

The animals are happy. From the
burqa/abaya clad individual comes the
sound of “Ribbid, Ribbid.” All the
Jungle-Land creatures look around
surprised then at each other.

GURU GODMAN
(cont’d)
Finally it is the turn of a young and talented singer. I invite on stage Melody.

Melody comes on stage. All the
creatures clap. Cuckoo gives an evil
smile.

MELODY
(singing)
The hills are alive with the Sound of Music.
(from the film Sound of Music)
The audience is entranced, particularly
Kite-King. Only the alien is closing
his ears with a pained expression. When
the song is over the creatures clap
enthusiastically and shout
“Bravo,Bravo”and “Hear, Hear!”
Cuckoo looks furious.The Kite-King comes on
stage.

KITE-KING
Well done, well done! Tonight’s program was excellent and entertaining. I am very pleased.
(The audience claps)
Singers from all parts of the world have entertained us tonight with songs in many different languages.                                             But music is one language that brings together people from all over the
world. For music knows no boundaries,no languages, it is above all. Music touches not our minds but our hearts.                                        And the entertainer whose song has touched all our hearts is no other than the winner of tonight’s contest, Melody.

The creatures clap and yell ‘Bravo’ and ‘Hear, Hear!’ Cuckoo looks furious.

KITE-KING (cont’d)
We would like Melody to come on stage and accept her prize.

Melody comes on stage and accepts her
gift. A tiny crown is placed on her
head.

KITE-KING (cont’d)
I am so pleased with Melody’s singing that I hereby appoint her as our court singer. Henceforth she will live here and
entertain me. The whole world will enjoy her music.
In return Melody will get untold riches and fame….
(The audience claps)

KITE-KING
(cont’d)
And henceforth she will live in a golden cage
(he looks at Cuckoo)
Since our old entertainer is about to retire she will now live in a brass cage and her cage will be prepared for Melody.
(It is clear that Cuckoo does
not like the Kite-King’s
suggestion.)

KITE-KING (cont’d)
And Cuckoo, you are hereby appointed Melody’s chaperone.
Please take care that she is taken care of and does not want for anything.

(Cuckoo stands up and curtsies. Kite-King looks at Melody)

KITE-KING (cont’d)
I congratulate you and wish you well for a bright future and a new world.

MELODY
(To Kite-King)
May I have your permission to say a few words?

KITE-KING
To be sure, you may.

MELODY
I thank you all for considering me worthy of such honor and for supporting me in this journey, I would like to call upon the person who has my deepest respect. I would like to call
her on stage and in front of all you ask her for her blessings. Mom…..

Caw-gee looks at Melody. She has tears
in her eyes. She walks slowly towards
the stage. She is old and has white
hair but Cuckoo recognizes her. Melody
touches Caw-Gee’s feet who blesses her.
The audience claps. The two embrace.

FADE TO BLACK.

SCENE 5 B

PLACE/TIME: SAME AS SCENE 5. THE STAGE IS BLACK FOR A MOMENT AND THEN SLOWLY LIGHTS UP TO SHOW THE AUDIENCE HAS LEFT. ONLY CUCKOO IS LEFT ALONE.
CHARACTERS:CUCKOO/ MR.RABID

Cuckoo is pacing the floor. A sudden
sound distracts her and she sees that a
burqa/abaya clad figure approaches her.

CUCKOO
(frightened)

What..who ..is there?

The burqa/abaya clad figure comes close
and lifts the veil from his face to
reveal Mr. Rabid. Cuckoo screams.

MR. RABID
Ribbid! I removed the veil from my face! Then why did you scream?

CUCKOO
Never mind. Who are you? I am going to call the sentry to throw you out.

MR. RABID
Don’t even think of making the mistake. You stand to lose a lot.

CUCKOO
Really? I have just lost everything. What do I have to lose now ?

MR. RABID
If you do as I tell you then you will get what your heart desires…

CUCKOO
What are you implying, sir. At least think of your grey beard before talking such rubbish.

MR. RABID
Oh dear me Madame. You have got me wrong. In any case, you are not that young either.

CUCKOO
(narrowing her eyes and raising
an eyebrow)
Really, For the likes of you I am no less than a beautiful hourie from heaven. Just which planet are you from Mister?

MR. RABID
Ribbid! Ribbid! Your tongue is as sharp as a knife. If you were in my country….

CUCKOO
Exactly, that’s why I am not in your country. I have no wish to live in a deep well
(she looks him up and down)
Nor do I wish to suffocate my self. I like to breathe free in the fresh air, understood?

MR. RABID
Do you call living in a golden cage freedom?

CUCKOO
Well, it certainly beats living in a dark well.

MR. RABID
Heaven help me! Why have I got myself entangled in this useless debate. Do you want to hear about something that is in your interest?

CUCKOO
All right, go on

MR. RABID
Actually I am the tutor to the Caw-Doors Band.

CUCKOO
Ah, so that is why you hide your face.

MR. RABID
What rubbish. The laws in your country are so weird that I have to resort to these means.

CUCKOO
Every country has its own laws. The laws in your country are no less weird.
( she shudders )
Goodness, I couldn’t live there for even a day.

MR. RABID
(irritated)
Who is calling you there in any event? Why don’t you listen to that which is in your interest?

CUCKOO
It’s not possible that it will only be in my interest and not yours. You don’t look like a philanthropist to me.

MR. RABID
(almost in tears)
Please, I beg of you. Listen to me carefully.

CUCKOO
All right, all right, hurry up. It’s time for my massage.

MR. RABID
(stuttering in disgust)
Massage? Here we are about to talk of important matters of the state, of a world which is going to be topsy-turvy and
you can only think of your massage.

CUCKOO
( tossing her head scornfully)
Soooooo! If you took an interest in some massage you wouldn’t be so hyper, I mean stressed, I mean tensed. You would be
more happy and relaxed.

MR. RABID
(hopping up and down)
Ribbid! Ribbid! Who says I am not relaxed. I am very happy go lucky.
(trying to laugh )
See how I laugh. He he he. See.

CUCKOO
All right, all right. There is no need for these histrionics.
All Right out with it. My time is precious.

MR. RABID
So I like I said before I am the tutor of the Caw-Doors band.

CUCKOO
Oh Yes, that reminds me you are Melody’s tutor too, then how did she learn to sing so well.

MR. RABID
What do you mean? Melody does not know how to sing and yet she won the contest.  I suspect a huge conspiracy is afoot and Kite- king is at the bottom of it all. I think he’s jealous of my talent and wants to discredit me in front of everyone.

CUCKOO
Are you retarded, by any chance?

MR. RABID
Ribbid, Ribbid.

CUCKOO
Anyway, go on.

MR. RABID
I feel the two of us should get together.    (Cuckoo gives him a hard stare),                            I don’t mean that. I mean if you help me to  dethrone Kite-King then, in return, I will make you the court singer.

CUCKOO
And pray tell me what is your plan to dethrone him.

Mr. Rabid takes out a packet from his garment.

MR. RABID
Here take this medicine. Just stir it in Kite-king’s tea.

CUCKOO
I see, and then what will happen?

MR. RABID
What will happen? Kite-king will lose his memory, he’ll forget he’s the king and we can easily place anyone we want on his throne.

CUCKOO
It seems to me you are very fond of Bollywood films. I mean memory loss and all that. Just like a movie.

MR. RABID
No way. I’m not fond of such trash. This kind of cheap entertainment is forbidden where I come from.

CUCKOO
Oh, then what’s all this singing and dancing,what’s your explanation for all that?

MR. RABID
I am doing all that out of my country, not in there.

CUCKOO
Wow,that kind of reasoning stinks of double standards. What is bad there can’t be good here?

MR. RABID
You won’t understand these political matters.

CUCKOO
Hmmm, I understand your political matters completely. These political matters have only one agenda, get what you want and have a lot of fun.  Who cares about the poor public. Any way,what do I care. As long as my fun and games continue I am not bothered what happens to the world around me(extends her hand forward). All right, give me your memory loss potion.

Mr. Rabid gives her vial. Cuckoo walks away, her heels clicking.

MR. RABID
So you want to be the court dancer eh, we’ll see about that.
You are not fit to be a street dancer. Just let me become the king then I will make you dance to my tune. You”ll forget your steps, Madame. Ribbid, ribbid.

FADE TO BLACK.
SCENE 6.
PLACE: KITE-KING’S COURT IN HIS PALACE/TIME:NIGHT

CHARACTERS:KITE-KING/MELODY/ALL THE COURTIERS/CUCKOO/GURU- GODMAN/PENGUIN/MRS. BROWN/DR.CHARLIE

MELODY
(singing sadly as she twirls
slowly)

SONG
The hills are alive with the sound of music
(From the film”Sound of Music”)

KITE-KING
Bravo, Bravo. I am pleased, very pleased. (to Cuckoo) I hope you are looking after her? She should not want for anything.

He takes out a string of pearls from his neck and extends his hand/wing to Melody.

KITE-KING (CONT’D)
This is for you.

Melody accepts the necklace but from her demeanor we can see that she is not happy.

KITE-KING (CONT’D)
It seems to me you are not very happy. Why? Is anything the matter ?

MELODY
You have given me everything but…

KITE-KING
But ?

Melody is silent.

KITE-KING                                                    Tell me ,what is that I cannot give you? (a little sternly), Come on, out with it?

MELODY (softly)
I want to breathe in the open air. Can I go back to the jungle?

KITE-KING
There is only one thing you cannot get and you have asked for it- Freedom. Besides this, you can have anything you want.

MELODY
I don’t want anything else. I just want to fly in the open skies, please let me go.

KITE-KING
(more sternly)
That is not possible. You can go now.

Melody walks away slowly, downcast.

KITE-KING
(to Cuckoo)
Go and explain to her, entertain her. Give her whatever she wants so that she no longer wants to leave from here.

CUCKOO’S VOICE
Yes , your highness.

Cuckoo goes away. Kite-King is lost in
thought when Guru-Godman, who is standing next to him speaks.

GURU GODMAN
With your permission Sire, can I say something?

KITE-KING
Yes, yes, go on.

GURU GODMAN
It is my observation,your highness, that this old Cuckoo will be unable to take care of the little cuckoo. On the contrary, it is very likely that she will only trouble her. My suggestion is we appoint someone else to take care of her.

KITE-KING
Wonderful,you have great manipulative skills. I am glad I included you in my council of ministers just after the contest.

GURU GODMAN
(bowing low)
I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

KITE-KING
So, in your wise opinion who would be most suitable to look after Melody?

GURU GODMAN
One name does comes to my mind but I am not sure if he will agree.

KITE-KING
Who?

GURU GODMAN
His name is Senior Julio. He lives in the same jungle to which Melody belongs.

KITE-KING
But, a man?

GURU GODMAN
By God’s grace he is blind.

KITE- KING
What a joke! A blind man to keep an eye on Melody. But really your manipulative skills are worthy of praise.

GURU GODMAN
So, should I send him a message Sire?

KITE-KING
Yes, of course!
(laughs)
Ah, the crafty Cuckoo will tie herself up in knots. Simply great, Guru-Godman, I am pleased.

GURU GODMAN
I have another request, Sire?

KITE-KING
Yes , of course. Go on.

GURU GODMAN
I have a friend, Mr. Rabid, who is very wealthy. He has embarked on a world tour. He would like to enjoy the sights and sounds of our country. Please grant him a visa.

KITE-KING
Why not, why not. If he is your friend he must be of some consequence. I will give orders for his visa. Do bring him to the court sometime.

GURU GOD-MAN
To be sure, your highness. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Pays his respects by bowing very low.

KITE-KING
(yawns loudly, bored of Guru-
Godman’s courtesies)
All right, all right,now think of something new to entertain us.
The contest was a complete washout.
Except for Melody’s all the items were absolute rubbish.

PENGUIN
(who is standing close by)
May I make a suggestion sire?

KITE-KING
Mr. Penguin, you are so cold, what suggestion could you possibly give? Anyway, go on.

PENGUIN
I think we should have a contest between Cuckoo and Melody.
The loser will have to become the other’s maid-servant.

KITE-KING
(laughs)
Great, simply great! What an idea. Your mind is a devil’s workshop and its working overtime.
(To Guru-Godman)
Make arrangements and invite all those who had come before.

GURU GODMAN
Yes, your sire.

Kite-king rises, stretches and yawns loudly.

KITE-KING
All right then, the court is adjourned. We’ll go and rest now.

Kite-king walks away. As he is going he
is scratching his beard,yawning,
rubbing his eyes. All the courtiers
heave a sigh of relief. Suddenly, Kite-
king comes back. Everyone is alert
again.

KITE-KING (cont’d)
Somebody tell Cuckoo to bring a glass of milk to my room.

GURU GODMAN
Yes, your highness.

Kite-king leaves. The other courtiers
follow. Only the Penguin waddles
behind.

GURU GODMAN
(to Penguin)
Your idea was excellent. Will you come to my house tonight.
Mr. Rabid is coming too.

PENGUIN
If you give me dinner I will come. I am fond of fish.

GURU GODMAN
Me too. I have arranged for some flies for Mr. Rabid. He is an expert in catching flies.

PENGUIN
Gross. Then it will be impossible to suffer him.

GURU GODMAN
Yes, but in politics one has to make friends with all kinds of people. And he can be useful, you know.

PENGUIN
All right then I’ll suffer him too. I’ll even swallow a few flies for his sake.

GURU GOD MAN
I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

They leave. We hear Penguin’s voice back-stage.

PENGUIN ( O.S.)
Your name is Guru but you speak English very well. Where did you get your training?

GURU GODMAN (O.S.)
We have been at it since my grandfather’s time Now it flows in my blood.

Melody walks in slowly. She sings the
same song she had sung in court, “The hills are alive with the sound of
music,” Cuckoo follows, there is a
glass of milk in her hand. Melody
stands behind some gold bars, she looks
sad.

CUCKOO
What do you want for?

MELODY
I want my Mom.

CUCKOO
Didn’t you recognise me. I Am your real mom. Many years ago I had left you in Caw-Gee’s nest. Come on, Give me a hug.

MELODY (moving back)
No, never. You Are not my mom, Caw-gee is my mom.

CUCKOO
I gave birth to you, Melody.

MELODY
So what, you gave birth to me and left me. Caw-gee gave me life.

CUCKOO
Your two are not the same. Look at me. My color, my looks, my qualities are all like yours. I can give you everything.
Riches, wealth, name, fame.

MELODY
Riches, wealth, name, fame – I can give you these, not you.
Today I have all this so you are with me. I don’t want any of  this.

CUCKOO
Then, what do you want, child?

MELODY
I want Caw-gee’s love.
(screams) I want Caw-Gee’s love.

Melody falls down on the bed covered
with a velvet bed spread and weeps.
Cuckoo takes out the vial which was
given to her by Mr. Rabid.

CUCKOO (V.O.)
I think I should give this memory loss potion to her. When she will forget her old life she’ll forget Caw-gee too. Then I can control her totally.

She pours the potion in the glass of
milk and then comes to Melody and
strokes her with loving hands.

CUCKOO
Melody, my child. Please get up and drink this milk, it will make you feel much better. I will personally talk to Kite- king today and ask him to send you back to your mother.

MELODY
(with tears in her eyes and
choked throat)
Promise ?

CUCKOO
Yes, yes, my child. I am your mother, not your enemy. Come drink this.

Melody drinks the milk laced with the potio.

MELODY
(putting her arms around
Cuckoo’s neck)
Mom, you are so wonderful.

She loses her grip and faints.

CUCKOO
(gets up and claps)
Hello, is anyone around?

Mrs. Brown comes running.

MRS. BROWN
Yes Missus…..I mean Yes Madame.

CUCKOO
Look at her, what has happened to her. Go and call the doctor right away and tell Guru-Godman to inform his highness that
Melody has fainted.

(Mrs. Brown is staring at her                             with a deer caught in the                         headlights expression)                                        Oh for God’s sake, what are you staring at me bug-eyed. Go on, hurry up.

MRS. BROWN
Yes, should I call the doctor first or go and inform Guru-Godman

CUCKOO
Oh Lordy, Lordy, are you a complete nincompoop? Go and tell Guru-Godman first. Only when he sees her condition will
matters proceed further.

MRS. BROWN (innocently)
What matters Missus…I mean Madame?

CUCKOO
Just this that his star singer is no longer in a state to entertain his highness. He’ll have no choice but to come to me.                                                   And he thought he could take away my golden cage.

There is a sound of someone clearing
his throat. Cuckoo and Mrs. Brown jump
in fright.

GURU GODMAN
I have seen everything and I have heard everything too.

Cuckoo is flustered.

CUCKOO
Sir, I was just saying, I mean….

GURU GODMAN
I know perfectly well what you mean. I have never seen anyone as mean as you. And now for your selfish interests your tried to do away with this poor wee creature. You will be punished for this, for sure.

CUCKOO
All right, go and tell. I, too, will tell his highness that I merely gave Melody the potion which your friend Mr. Rabid had given me to give him.

GURU GODMAN
(sighing deeply)
You are a very crooked woman. And how did you come to know that Mr. Rabid is my friend?

CUCKOO
Not only I, but everyone knows he is your friend. You asked for his visa in front of everyone. What do you think, are you
the only one who has spies?

GURU GODMAN
All right, all right, Mata Hari. This round is yours. But. what do we do with her (looks at Melody) And I have called for Senor Julio to take care of her.

CUCKOO
According to my sources Senor Julio is blind, so he can while his time away in some corner. And as for her, she has lost her memory,not her singing abilities, so now she will sing and dance to our tune.

All this while Mrs. Brown has been
stepping back slowly and now she
quickly takes a step back and
disappears from the scene.

CUCKOO
(looking around)
Oh, where did Mrs. Brown vanish. These folks are a bunch of lazy good for nothings. One’s attention is diverted for just a second and off they go. It’s just as well or we would have to get rid of her as well.

GURU GODMAN
We’ll have to show this one to the doctor just so that his highness does not suspect any foul play.

CUCKOO (screaming)
Mrs. Brown, Mrs. Brown, where the dickens are you?

Mrs. Brown rushes in, panting.

MRS. BROWN
Yes, Missus…I mean, Madame.

CUCKOO
Go and call Dr. Charlie and be quick.

MRS. BROWN
Yes, yes Missus…I mean Madame, madame.

Mrs. Brown leaves. Cuckoo picks up the
glass and holds it high and says
looking at it.

CUCKOO
I hope she loses only her memory with this potion. There will be no other ill effects.

GURU GODMAN
That only Dr. Charlie can tell us.

Dr. Charlie comes followed by Brown.

DR.CHARLIE
Oh dear, oh dear, what happened? Dr. Charlie at your service.

GURU GODMAN
Will you (pointing to Melody) look at her please. We know what happened. She just fainted suddenly.

Dr. Charlie takes out a large
magnifying glass and inspects Melody.

DR.CHARLIE
The patient’s condition is extremely serious. Her body has bloated up hugely.

CUCKOO (sarcastically)
Maybe it is because you are looking at her through a magnifying glass.

Dr. Charlie takes out a stethoscope and
puts the two ends into Melody’s ears
and listens into one with his ear.

DR.CHARLIE
I can hear some strange sounds. The patient’s mental state is highly disturbed.

GURU GODMAN
I think you need to get your brains examined as soon as possible.

CUCKOO
(voice dripping with sarcasm)
What can anyone do about the state of affairs in this country. Fools rush in here and angels fear to tread.
Everything is available at wholesale prices and this doctor too is part of the deal.

DR.CHARLIE (angrily)
Maybe you are not aware that I hold an M.B.B.S. Degree.

CUCKOO
And I know very well what that means, My Boys,Babies and Spouses need my services and for that I need to stick it to you. Just like you your degrees too are available at wholesale rates.

GURU GODMAN
Anyway, now just do what other folks do. Just splash some water on her face.

He looks towards Mrs. Brown who is
staring open-mouthed. She is flustered
and runs off and comes back with a bowl
of water. Dr. Charlie splashes Melody’s
face with water. Melody opens her eyes
and looks around wide-eyed and
distressed. Then she tries to speak.

MELODY
Ko…..

CUCKOO
Melody! What happened, tell me?

Melody stares at her wide-eyed, trying in vain to speak.

MRS. BROWN
Lordloveaduck! The cat has got the wee mite’s tongue.

CUCKOO
What are you saying? Can’t you speak plain English?
Ignoramus,hilly billy critter.

GURU GODMAN
Well, she speaks the truth in her rustic way. This one’s voice has gone and,most probably, she can’t recognise anyone too.

CUCKOO
Drat it !
(then a little happily)
Well, now at least they will have to reinstate me as the court singer.

Kite-king enters.

KITE-KING
Wrong! That is impossible. You are no longer fit for this post. We now seek fresh blood which is young,beautiful and can entertain us. Dry,old bones will not do.
(To Guru-Godman)
Send Peace-meal pigeon with the message that we are going to hold another contest. This time, besides untold wealth the winner will also get dearness allowance, transport, medical
and an expense account.

CUCKOO
(drawing in her breath)
Oh! This prize will tempt anyone.

KITE-KING
Yes,and I think you should start thinking about packing your bags and moving on. And yes, along with you,
(pointing to Melody)
Take her along too. She is of no use now.

CUCKOO
What will I do with her? Call her mom. She’ll take her away.

GURU GODMAN
She is absolutely right. And there is no need for that thrush, Senor Julio too. I will tell him not to come.

KITE-KING
It he wants to pay his way and come, he can come. I have heard he too is fond of singing and dancing. He used to be a very famous singer at one time. Then he went blind due to an accident. And ever since then he stopped performing in public. Now he lives in a cottage in the jungle.

CUCKOO
Yes, I remember. Many years ago, I mean not so very long ago, just about fifteen, no, ten, no…

GURU GODMAN
There is no need to stress your bird brain. I know for a fact that the thrush has not performed in public for the last twenty five years. Go on now.

CUCKOO (grimacing)
Uh, oh! Anyway, both of us had performed together once before the Queen of England. Suddenly the electricity went off. The thrush was holding a mike. When the lights came on again suddenly there was a loud bang and smoke all over.
Senor Julio shouted and fainted right there. He lost his eyes in that accident.

KITE-KING
(yawning)
All right, all right, there is no need for your hundred year old tales. Take this ( looking towards Melody) one away and
(looking towards Dr. Charlie) you help her too. If You can’t cure a body at least you can help lift it.

Mrs. Brown steps forward too. Cuckoo
and Mrs. Brown lift Melody from the
shoulders and Dr. Charlie lifts her
feet. They all leave the stage.

GURU GODMAN
Sire, till you get someone to replace the Cuckoo don’t throw her out.

KITE-KING
You are so right. We do need someone to entertain us. We’ll just have to make do with her.
(sighing deeply)
It’s just my bad luck.

GURU GODMAN
(smiling)
Don’t lose heart, your highness. Just throw a few coins and watch the fun. Not one but thousands will come running. Their breed is such. There are just a few who care about the arts, and one of those was Melody, but alas, that crafty Cuckoo has cast her evil eye on her.

KITE-KING
Well, her time is up in any case. You just go ahead and announce the contest.

GURU GODMAN
(bowing low)
Yes, your highness. Your slightest whim is my command.

KITE-KING
I like your style. That is why I chose to make a high school failed like you my minister over many talented candidates.
Come on, it’s late.
(Yawns)
I am off to sleep.

Goes away.

GURU GODMAN
( narrowing his eyes)
Oh, you love to sleep, don’t you.
One day I’ll put you to sleep permanently that you won’t get up to see the morning sun. I am just a high school drop out but I will make sure you’ll drop dead soon.

Fade out

ACT 3
Scene 1

PLACE: A CORNER OF THE JUNGLE /TIME: DAY
CHARACTERS: ALL THE CREATURES OF JUNGLE-LAND AND SENOR JULIO.

(All the animals from Jungle-
land are busy playing. The two
rabbits, Laurel and Hardy,are
wrestling with each other, the
crows are playing baseball.
The deer, parrot and
butterflies are also playing.
Banana-Drama, the monkey is
giving the commentary. The
game can be imaginary.)

BANANA-DRAMA
Do-ray has thrown the ball and Me-far has hit it, the ball is flying….
(We can hear the plodding sound of Gee-Peck’s boots coming towards them )
Across the boundary
(Gee-peck catches the ball)
Straight into Gee-Peck’s hands.

GEE-PECK
Saved by a wing and a prayer.

BANANA-DRAMA
Can we call this a run out

ALL THE CROWS (shouting)
Out, out!

BANANA-DRAMA
This is not a run out because Gee-Peck is not a member of the team.

Gee-peck throws the ball which lands on Mr. Rabid who gets up with a start.

MR. RABID
Ribbid! Ribbid! Is the game over or not? Come on my students!
Its time for music practise. You will surely win the contest this time.
That is why I have hopped from such a long way to help you.
Come on now, take out your music instruments.

(The crows take out their music
instruments. The other animals
take out the devices like ear
plugs,cotton wool etc. to shut
out the sound. There is a
sound of someone singing. It
is Senor Julio, the blind
singer, who is coming towards
them tap-tapping with his
cane. He is wearing dark
glasses. He bumps into Gee-
peck.)

GEE-PECK
Brother,careful! Can’t you see?

SENOR JULIO
No.

GEE-PECK
Oh! I am sorry! Dark glasses are in fashion so I did not realize and….

MR. RABID
Sure! you couldn’t see the cane too ?

GEE-PECK
(giving him a hard stare)
You love to fan the fire, don’t you?
(to Senor Julio)
I thought, you use the stick to protect yourself from the many deadly creatures hiding in the grass like snakes,scorpions and some poisonous toads.

Mr. Rabid begins to puff up in anger.
Caw-gee tries to save the situation by
quickly intervening and addressing
Senor Julio.

CAW-GEE
What do you want?

SENOR JULIO
Does Melody live here?

CAW-GEE
She used to live here but ever since she won the contest she has become the chief entertainer in Kite-King’s court. Now
she lives there. But, how do you know her?

SENOR JULIO
She was my pupil.

BANANA-DRAMA
Gee, that Melody sure turned out to be a dark horse. I used to wonder, how did she become such a hit singer?

MR. RABID
So,you used to give her tuitions. Now I know why there was no improvement in her singing. This system of extra tuition has completely spoilt our system of education….tuition is not good.

SENOR JULIO
I want to meet Melody. Somehow, I have this feeling in my bones that Melody is not happy.

FLOW-JO
(to Peter parrot)
Blind folks have a stronger sixth sense than us.

CAW-GEE
To meet Melody you will have to go very far from this jungle. To the city.

SENOR JULIO
Oh !

CAW-GEE
We are all going to leave soon. The Kite-king is holding another contest.

GEE-PECK
You can come too.

MR. RABID
(puffing up with importance)
But he doesn’t have a visa. My friend Guru-Godman arranged one for me but for him….

GEE-PECK
Yes, indeed, this is a serious matter.

MR. RABID
And, contestants are forbidden from getting their teacher or mentor with them.

(Everyone is quiet, they have
their thinking caps on)

BANANA-DRAMA
(jumping with joy)
An idea !
(All the creature look at him with anticipation)
If he can’t go as a teacher or mentor he can go as a contestant, for sure.

(All the animals, except Mr.
Rabid, jump around in
excitement)

GEE-PECK
Banana-Drama! You are a genius.

CAW-GEE
(laughs)
It seems to me that you do need brains even to imitate. I used to think you are all style and no substance but it seems to me you do pack a punch.

FLOW-JO
(giggling)
Hey, Caw-gee, haven’t you heard that song.
(she sings)

SONG
Muhammad, Muhammad Ali
He floats like a butterfly and sings like a bee.
Muhammad, the black superman,
Who calls to the other guy I’m Ali catch me if you can.
(All the creatures sing and
dance with joy. Gee-Peck does
the tap dance)
Muhammad, Muhammad Ali
He floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee
Muhammad the black superman
Who calls to the other guy I’m Ali catch me if you can

(Banana-drama’s walkman falls
on the stage as the creatures
move out of the stage singing
and dancing as they go. Only
Mr. Rabid is left behind. He
takes out his cellphone and
presses a button.)

MR. RABID
(speaking on the phone)
Hello. Who is that? Oh Guru-Godman. I am your dear friend Mr. Rabid speaking. Greetings from me to you!                                                          I just wanted to inform you that Melody’s teacher is also coming to your kingdom but as contestant.
(he listens for sometime)
What !
(The mobile falls from his
hand, he picks it up hastily
and holds it to his ear)
Melody has lost her memory and her voice too. Ribbid, ribbid. I Had given the medicine for Kite-king then what, oh, this is the crafty cuckoo’s doing indeed.                                                      All right then, I will make some other arrangements, all right, all right then.
My heartfelt good wishes to you.

(he switches off the phone and
hops off the stage. Banana
– drama comes from the other
side to pick up the walkman he
had dropped. The monkey picks
up the walkman.)

BANANA-DRAMA
(thinking)
Oh so that is the way the cookie crumbles. I will consult Gee- peck, Peter,and Flow-Jo and decide what is do be done now!

SCENE 2.
PLACE: KITE-KING’S COURT. TIME: NIGHT.
CHARACTERS: ALL THE CREATURES WHO WERE PRESENT AT THE
PREVIOUS CONTEST. THIS TIME MR. RABID IS NOT WEARING A VEIL.

The kite-king is seated on his throne. Guru Godman comes on stage.

GURU GODMAN
All of you are very welcome. I am sure you must wondering that we just held a contest, what was the hurry for another one.

The reason for this is the Kite-king’s generosity and soft heart. He has kept the contest with this logic in mind that winning and losing are only two sides of the same coin so why should only one person become the winner. Why don’t we give a prize to each contestant according to his talent as one’s meat is another’s poison.                                                          You must be thinking what kind of weird logic is this so without further ado let me invite on stage the four talented guys from the jungle, the Caw-Doors Band.
(The audience claps. Mr. Rabid
who is standing on the edge of
the stage propels the four crows
forward.)

MR. RABID
This is your chance, lady luck is about to smile on you.
(The four crows come on stage and arrange their instruments)

(All the animals take out the
various devices to close their
ears such as ear plugs, cotton
wool etc and plug their ears.
Peter parrot is standing in
front of a pillar.)

SONG
Lots of chocolates for me to eat,
lots of chocolates for me to eat,
Lots of chocolates for me to eat,
Lots of chocolates for me to eat.

(The four crows go on and on and on
repeating the same
line refusing to stop. After
some time Peter parrot is
beating his head on the pillar
keeping time with the song. )

KITE-KING
Enough! stop! What kind of song is this?

DO-RAY
This is a rap song, sire.

KITE-KING
Rap, to be sure. Anyone who sings this song should be rapped hard on the knuckles and made to wrap his singing career.
Henceforth, this song should be given to the farmers.
(Everyone looks at him,
surprised)
There is no better song than this to drive away the birds from the fields. We are pleased with your service to us. You will be henceforth known as , what did you say was the name of this song?

ME-FAR
Rap song.

KITE-KING
You will be known as rap stars
(The four crows jump and give
each other high fives. The
animals clap.
KITE-KING
Anyone else ?

GURU GODMAN
Yes, your sire. There is a new contestant. I mean an old contestant but now in a new avatar who would like to present an item for your listening pleasure.

KITE-KING
To be sure. Old is gold.

CUCKOO
(addressing the audience)
It seems he has understood finally. Anyway, no problem, he will live and learn.

(Senor Julio comes on stage and sings)

SONG
CHIM CHIMINEYCHIM CHIMINEY CHIM CHIM CHER-EE!
A SWEEP IS AS LUCKY
AS LUCKY CAN BE
CHIM CHIMINEY CHIM CHIMINEY CHIM CHIM CHER-OO!
GOOD LUCK WILL RUB OFF WHEN I SHAKE ‘ANDS WITH YOU
OR BLOW ME A KISS
AND THAT’S LUCKY TOO
(The Kite-king and the audience are entranced, they all give him a standing ovation)
KITE-KING
Bravo! Bravo! Wonderful. You are an extraordinary talent but alas! In our kingdom we have place only for a female entertainer I mean a lady singer or dancer
(looks at Guru Godman)                                     Am I right Guru-Godman?

GURU GODMAN
Yes, your sire. In any case we men hardly have time from our brain-related business. These kind of shenanigans only suit the women folk.

CUCKOO
(who is sitting next to Flow-Jo
leans towards her and says)
Just listen to these men folk,one can learn a trick or two about how to eat your cake and have it too. They will send the women to the front to face the fire from the enemy and when it suits them they will not miss a trick to use them for their burning desires, if you get my drift. Dirty, rotten scoundrels.

FLOW-JO (giggling)
It seems to me you will soon become a member of the women’s liberation movement.

CUCKOO
No way! I am against such nonsense. Just cropping your hair short like men or wearing trousers cannot free you. For me only money is freedom.

FLOW-JO
But for money you are dancing to their tune. Then what kind of freedom are you talking about?
(We see that a just a few
moments after this conversation began Kite-King is glaring at them, then the others too are looking at them. When The two of them feel the silence they look around flustered.)

KITE-KING
I am giving such an important speech and the two of you are yakking away?
(The two of them stand up)

CUCKOO
Forgive us Sire. We were just telling each other how young and handsome you look tonight.

KITE-KING                                                        (cooling down)
Thank you! But this is not the time for small talk when important matters of the state are being discussed.

GURU GODMAN
Sire, please don’t trouble yourself. These women are never going to change. What else can they think of besides lipstick, make up, clothes and jewels.

MR. RABID                                                (standing up)
May I have your permission to say a few words. Sire.

KITE-KING
And who may you be?

GURU GODMAN                                                      He is my friend, Mr. Rabid.

KITE-KING
Oh I see, the visa fellow. Go on, have your say.

MR. RABID                                                 (pointing to Cuckoo)
Ask her where has she hidden Melody?
(Caw-gee and the creatures from
the jungle are startled. Kite- king and Guru Godman are flabbergasted. Cuckoo opens her beak to say something, then closes it.)

GURU GODMAN
Yes, yes, she has hidden Melody some place because she is jealous of her.
(The Kite-King looks at Guru
God man and realizes what the                      other is trying to say)

KITE-KING                                                               (to Cuckoo)
At once, present Melody in court or you will be the worse for it.

CAW-GEE (screams)
My child, my wee one!
(addressing Cuckoo)
You have hidden my daughter some place, out with it or I will wring or neck, I was thinking that now there would be an item by Melody, she will coming soon but…

MR. RABID
Madam, you have no idea how crafty is this cuckoo. It was her plan to get rid of Melody so that she could take her place as the court singer but her plans were not successful. Melody is still alive, only she has lost her voice and her memory.

CAW-GEE (screams)                                                My baby !

MR. RABID
And her plan was also to get rid of the Kite-king. She had confided in me about her nefarious plans.

CUCKOO (screams)
Lies! lies! all lies ! it was he ….. (shuts her beak)

GURU GODMAN                                            (smiling evilly)
Go on, do go on. But remember this you better back you words with proof or else….

KITE-KING                                                     (furious)
What? She dares? (Clapping his wings/hands) Guards! Guards!                                             (Peace-meal, the pigeon and Mr. Brown run in, Mr. Brown is a little unsteady on his feet)

KITE-KING (to Peace-meal)
You? Where are the other guards?

PEACE-MEAL
Sire, they have gone to pour, I mean, protect the oil which is in troubled waters so that the kingdom can keep running smoothly on well oiled wheels.

KITE- KING
Where have they gone?

PEACE-MEAL.                                              (pointing to Mr. Rabid)
Close to his well there is another well. The water of that well has certain herbs which are famous for their oil. It is said that it keeps the mind fresh and the body strong and healthy.

KITE-KING                                                                   ( pointing to Mr. Brown)
And what about him? Why can’t he stand straight?

PEACE-MEAL
Sire, he is Mr. Hadalot, I mean Sir Lancelot Brown. This morning he drank a little too much, I mean tea which does not suit him at all and that is why he is in this condition.
(Mr. Brown can’t keep his balance and falls down. Mrs Brown screams and runs to him with her five children)

MRS. BROWN.                                                            My husband !
(She cries hysterically and the children scream daddy, daddy)

KITE-KING (shouts)
Stop this infernal racket. Where is Dr. Charlie?
(Dr. Charlie runs out from the crowd)              What kind of a doctor are you. Don’t you have sense enough to come to a patient at once.

DR.CHARLIE
I had come to see the show so I didn’t bring my medical bag.

GURU GODMAN
No matter what the crisis, he is always ready with hisexcuses.

KITE-KING                                                     Examine the patient please.
(Dr. Charlie takes out his                       magnifying glass and                                 examines Mr. Brown. The Cuckoo takes             this opportunity to sidle out)
Where did you get your degree?

MR.BROWN
From the Lee Strasberg School of Acting. I have played a doctor in many movies and television shows.

KITE-KING
And, if I am not mistaken, this costume you are wearing is from the costume department of General Hospital.

DR. CHARLIE
How did you guess?

GURU GODMAN
We are deeply grateful to the good Lord that his royal highness did on fall sick or else….

DR.CHARLIE                                                   (miffed)
Maybe you are not aware of the fact that I have cured many fatal diseases in many films. In ‘Love Story” Ali Mcgraw had cancer and so did Debra Winger in “Terms of Endearment” and had it not been for me they

GURU GODMAN                                                     But didn’t they both die in the film?

DR.CHARLIE
That was the director’s fault. I had cured them completely.
These director’s are famous for killing people in films so that it runs.
(By this time Cuckoo has left                              the stage)

KITE-KING                                                             Will you both stop this balderdash.
(addressing Dr. Charlie)                                    Why don’t you follow your regular line of treatment and sprinkle some water on his face.

(The alien comes forward and gives him a weirdly shaped blue bottle. Dr. Charlie pours out some liquid on his palm and sprinkles Mr. Brown’s face. Mr. Brown gets up instantly.)

MRS. BROWN                                                         My husband!

BROWN’S FIVE CHILDREN.                          Daddy! Daddy!

MR.BROWN
A current of energy and strength is running through my body. I feel as if I can tackle anyone.

BANANA-DRAMA
(jumps and stands before him)                               In that case
(he points to Mr. Rabid)
Can you push him? After all you are tiny and he is big and fat.

MR. RABID
Ribbid! Ribbid!

(Mr. Brown goes to Mr. Rabid.
He stands before him and blows on him.           Mr. Rabid stumbles backwards and falls down with a resounding thump.                                    All the animals laugh uproariously.)

MR. RABID                                                                   Ribbid ! Ribbid !

KITE-KING (laughing)
Very good, very good. Now do what you had been called for in the first place. Take the crafty cuckoo….
(looks around)                                                 Where is she? Find her.
(Everyone disperses)

MR. RABID.                                              (whispering to Caw-Gee)
I am sure she is with Melody. Why don’t you ask Senor Julio to sing her favorite song. You never know she may follow his voice and come here or give some clue to her whereabouts.

CAW-GEE                                                                 Not a bad idea at all.
(She goes to Senor Julio and says)
Senor Julio, why don’t you sing Melody’s favorite song. Melody may hear it and come to us.

SENOR JULIO.                                                           All right.
(He holds the mike and sings)
SONG

Edelweiss, edelweiss
Every morning you greet me
Small and white
Clean and bright
You look happy to meet me
Blossom of snow may you bloom and grow Bloom and grow forever
Edelweiss, edelweiss                                          Bless my homeland forever.

(Everyone is entranced by his                         song. After some time we can                           hear Melody’s voice. She is                           singing in tandem with Senor                         Julio. Singing she comes on                             stage, followed by the Cuckoo.                    Melody completes the song with                   Senor Julio. She Has tears in                               her eyes,her lips are                                 quivering, her voice is quavering.)

CAW-GEE                                                         (rushes to Melody).                                                   Baybeee…..
(Melody embraces her and cries)                       My child, what happened to you?
(Cuckoo looks at her.                                frightened)

MELODY.                                                                    There is nothing to worry about mom. I went dizzy in the bathroom and fell down and hit my head on floor and fainted.

GEE-PECK (to Peter)
The same old story when you want to save someone.

MELODY
(gesturing towards Cuckoo)
Had it not been for Madame Cuckoo I would not be alive today, Mom.

CAW-GEE
No, no, banish the very thought, my child.     You are safe and
sound, that is enough for me.                             (to Cuckoo)
I am very, very grateful to you.
(Tears are streaming down                        Cuckoo’s cheeks )

CUCKOO
Please forgive me Melody, I never wanted to kill you. Greed had made me blind. I though that if you lost your memory then you would
(gesturing to Caw-Gee) )
forget her and accept me as your mom. But How was I to know that you would lose your voice as well.
(angrily)                                                                    All this is because of
(pointing to Mr. Rabid)                                       This fat frog and
(points to Guru Godman)
This hypocritical bird. Both of them had plotted to kill our gracious king. But how could I be so disloyal?

BANANA-DRAMA.                                                  (to Peter)
She may be a wily bird but she is not so bad at heart.

FLOW-JO
Seems to me her tears have washed away the ill will in her heart.

CUCKOO (to Kite-King)
Sire, this entire plot was the handiwork of your loyal minister Guru Godman and his dearest friend, Mr. Rabid.

GURU GODMAN
This Cuckoo is a liar, its her last desperate attempt to save herself.

PENGUIN
No, she speaks the truth. I am a witness to the fact that these two tried to lure me to be a part of their plan but were unsuccessful, naturally.

BANANA-DRAMA                                              Ah! A new twist in the tale.

KITE-KING (angrily)
So,this is what has been happening!
(gestures to Peace-meal and Mr.
Brown).                                                           Capture these two terrorists.

(Mr. Rabid and Guru Godman try to escape but all the animals surround them and Mr. Brown                     blows on the two and pushes  them towards Kite-king till they fall at is feet.                                After this whenever they try to                           escape Mr. Brown prevents them by blowing on them and brining them back to their original position.)

KITE-KING
(looking towards Banana-Drama)
Thank you. If you had not called me and warned me about these two traitors I would have been taken in by their arguements.
(Mr. Rabid glares at Banana Drama)

BANANA-DRAMA                                          (bowing low)
There is no need to thank me. After all humans, I mean animals, must help other animals, I mean animals must help you. I am just happy that
(looking at Mr. Rabid)                                          We are free from this tuneless toad.

KITE-KING                                                              Tell me, how can I reward you?

BANANA-DRAMA
Well, it was only my sense of duty which made me do what I did but if you really want to reward me please give permission to Melody go back to her home.

KITE-KING
You have made a difficult request. If she goes back who will entertain me?

CUCKOO (softly)
I am here, your highness.
(Kite-King glances at her
fleetingly. Suddenly Melody speaks)

MELODY                                                               Mom.                                                                      (she faints)

KITE-KING
Oh, she has fainted again. Where is Dr. Charlie?
(Dr. Charlie comes near Melody and examines her with his magnifying glass.)

DR.CHARLIE
She is being stifled in this atmosphere. She has to leave this place or she won’t survive.

KITE-KING                                                        Where to?

DR.CHARLIE
In the open air where she can breathe, far from here, in the jungle.

ALL THE ANIMALS.                                  (shouting)
Please, please

CAW-GEE
Your highness, please save my daughter’s life, let her go.
(The Kite-King thinks, there is pin drop silence in the court.)

KITE-KING
All right.

ALL THE ANIMALS.                                                  (Joyfully)
Yaaaaaaay!

KITE-KING (raising his hand/wing)

There is one condition!
(all the animal are quiet)

All of you will come with Cuckoo and Senor Julio to meet me once a year.
ALL THE ANIMALS
Yaaaaay! Thank you.

ALIEN
Zee zoo zap. Zim zim za zoo.

GEE-PECK
What is he saying?

(The alien comes near Senor Julio, the blind thrush, takes out his dark glasses.
From his flask he takes out                             some liquid and splashes it on                           his eyes. Senor Julio, whose                             eyes were closed opens them. )

SENOR JULIO.                                                               I can see.                                                                 (he looks at Cuckoo)

CUCKOO
Please forgive me. I hurt your feelings. When you went blind I left you and came away.

SENOR JULIO (whispering)
When you went away you were….

CUCKOO
Yes, my husband, Melody is your daughter.
(Everyone is shocked. Melody moves slowly towards Senor Julio)

BANANA-DRAMA                                        Another twist in the tale.

FLOW-JO                                                              How romantic!

GEE-PECK                                                            What a beautiful twist.

(Both of them look into each other’s eyes)
BANANA-DRAMA
Oh, for Pete’s sake, why don’t you get over your old as hills love story and get married.

PETER
You won’t understand. The bitter-sweet feeling of being apart is more satisfying then getting hitched.

MELODY
Dad!
(goes towards Senor Julio)
(Senor Julio embraces Melody. Everyone claps.)
KITE-KING
All right then! Senor Julio and Cuckoo are hereby appointed as the chief singer and dancer of our court and

(looking towards Melody)

Where would you like to stay?

MELODY
Your highness, I would like to be with Caw-gee.
(she goes towards Caw-Gee and embraces her)
She took a stranger into her home and heart, gave her love and made her own. I owe to her to love her in return.

KITE-KING

As you wish
(looks towards Mr. Brown)
Henceforth you are my Chief Minister but keep in mind,get into the habit of drinking tea. All other stuff is off limits for you.

MRS. BROWN

My husband!

CUCKOO
She is he real drama-queen, not me. Oh well, now that she is the minister’s wife I will have to find me another one.

SENOR JULIO (lovingly)
I am there to do all your work.

CUCKOO                                               (dramatically)                                                        My husband!
(They embrace. Senor Julio                            sings, followed by Cuckoo,                               then Melody.                                                          The animals sing  in chorus.)
SONG
(We are the World by Michael
Jackson)

There comes a time
When we head a certain call
When the world must come together as one There are people dying
And it’s time to lend a hand to life.                   The greatest gift of all

We can’t go on
Pretending day by day
That someone, somewhere                                 will soon make a change                                                                      We are all a part of
God’s great big family
And the truth, you know                                    love is all we need
[Chorus]
We are the world
We are the children
We are the ones who make a brighter day        So let’s start giving
There’s a choice we’re making
We’re saving our own lives
It’s true we’ll make a better day
Just you and me.
THE END.

0

BELLA BRINGS IT ON

Hello folks, I bet you are wondering where this dog diva has vanished. I have been away for a bit. No, not on a vacation unfortunately. I just had a massive writer’s block which just means I didn’t know what to write.

I kept wondering what brings on this situation which is particular to dogs and writers or dog writers. And then I realised it was brought on by disturbance and that caused me stress. I was going round and round chasing my own tail.

ROUND AND AROUND

 

 

 

 

Then I thought what was it that was causing this condition ? Could it be my diet ? I am eating dog food only and that is not a happy situation for a dog who has had a taste of human food once. They just can’t go back. But then, it’s not up to us , is it ?

Is it the environment ? I have been at the receiving end of a lot of unwanted attention recently. When it comes to company, I am very choosy. I like human company or dogs who are more human than dog which means they have to be civilized and well mannered and not boisterous.

 

Watch this and you don’t have to make any wild guesses as to the source of my angst ( angst means distressed 😩  in spirit – now you can use this word casually in a conversation and impress your mom and dad e.g . There is so much angst in me because  I can’t play video games for 14 hours ! Just kidding . Don’t play more than 13 hours ! Kidding again. Only what your parents  permit  you )

 

So that’s it. I have found the root of my disturbed state. It is Toby. He has become a frequent visitor and he is making me uncomfortable. He is just not my type. To add to my woes he has been slurping water from my bowl and crunching food from my plate without so much as by your leave.

TOBY TROUBLE

 

Okay, now that I have got to the root of my stress I am going to do something about it. Wait for my next post about ” Bella plans to get rid of Toby.” If you have read the story, “All about cats” where Bella was saved from the machinations of a wily cat by divine intervention then you know it’s not in a DOG’S hand/paw to save herself but in a DOG spelt backwards hand to help this dog !

( Of course, we all know that DOG spelt backwards helps those who help them selves. So let’s see if DOG spelt backwards will guide the intellect of this DOG with his shining knowledge ! )

LEAD KINDLY LIGHT …..

LEAD KINDLY LIGHT …

0

Happy 😀 Independence 🇺🇸 Day ☀️! ( it will be happier if you could throw this dog diva a bone or better still , a sausage or two )

BELLA’S ANGST RIDDEN TIRADE !

IS THIS RIGHT ? IS THIS FAIR ? WHY ARE WE NOT INDEPENDENT ENOUGH TO DECIDE WHAT IS GOOD FOOD FOR US ! HOW DOES THE SLAVE ( YOU )DECIDE WHAT IS GOOD FOR THE MASTER / MISTRESS ( MOI )

All right folks, here is Bella, the dog diva pontificating about , ‘cabbages and kings and whether pigs have wings !’ Lewis Carroll, the fellow who wrote this gibberish was quite a genius wasn’t he ? And talking of nonsensical verse there is the inimitable Robbie Yates, check him out ! https://wp.me/P9q2s6-2

Now coming back to the subject of ‘whether pigs have wings ‘ is the related one about sausages. It’s Fourth of July and Barbecue day where sausages are floating around right in front of my eyes. But the question is, are all those floating sausages held by various humans of all shapes and sizes going to find their way into my mouth ? I have noticed when it comes to food the human kind are not very kind . I see them chomping away on various delicacies with nary a thought of their lord ( in this case lady aka moi ) and master waiting in the wings for a tidbit. And, if we are denied this delicacy why do you even call it hot dog !

And what’s all this nonsense about dogs should only have dog food !! It makes my blood boil . Who made these rules ? And why ? And why give us a taste if you are going to abruptly deny these privileges with some cockamamie reason like , ‘no wheat for the dog ‘ and ‘sugar makes her hair fall ‘ and ‘ Bella is putting on weight ‘

If that is the case then please look at yourself , humans . Why are you eating all that red meat ! And slathering those buns with butter and chugging down huge amounts of soda and topping it off with that brown looking sweet thing with that cold even sweeter mess on top ? ( Bella’s talking about Brownies with vanilla bean ice cream ) . This is hypocrisy carried to the extreme. But, I am not going to make an issue about it. After all its Independence Day and you are free to do what you want, even stuff your faces till you are ready to burst. Just don’t forget the dog waiting in the wings for her share of goodies too .

Happy Independence Day !

29BA4854-E7A6-4B4C-90A1-C47CD9A28900

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY !
Photo by AMBIKA , the assistant who is the best tummy rubber, ball thrower, AND now the best dog 🐶 photographer ! Kudos kid !

MORE PHOTOS COMING UP AS SOON AS MY ASSISTANTS ARE READY TO TAKE THEM ( WHEN THEY CAN TEAR THEMSELVES AWAY FROM THE FOOD )

3

BELLA FEELS THE HEAT WITH Sir Toby .

OMG ! OMG ! OMG ! There is a new body in my home and he is an absolute goofball ! He is goofy and he loves balls . That is all he wants in life. To run after balls . Big balls, small balls , blue balls , yellow balls . Just throw one and watch him go . Even flat balls will do , the ones that don’t roll , they look like flying saucers . ( Note from her assistant : I think Bella is talking about frisbees ) And talking of flying you should see this guy go ! This much energy is enough to drive me nuts ! As it is, and I think I may have mentioned it before, I am not the ‘gym and look at my lean body’ type but with this one around I too had to make an attempt to run for my keep or this guy , this goofball, was hogging all the attention. This is so demeaning but well, that’s life . I guess, there are no free lunches .

Well here’s a quick look at what my life has been ever since this Toby critter has entered my quiet, placid life and taken over and , to add insult to injury, he has taken away the attention of my devoted pack . Can’t wait for him to go !

Bella, moi , would like to thank Ambika in editing this movie . Besides, being an excellent tummy rubber , she is also a great ‘ball – thrower’ ( TOBY will vouch for that, I am sure ! )

BELLA BRINGS HER PINK BONE & MAKES A DESPERATE ATTEMPT TO COMPETE WITH TOBY